As soon as people read my posts and find out I am autistic there’s always a few questions that often get asked. How should a potential Dom handle my autism? What should they be looking out for? What’s the best approach to take? So… I’ve put together a few things that may be helpful, though everyone is different and it would really depend on how things go once we actually meet.

Firstly, I can guarantee that I will be VERY shy and nervous the first few times we even talk on the phone, let alone meet! So it’s best to take things slow, and have no expectations to begin with. I’d feel a lot happier if the Dom were to take the lead on the conversation, I find it easier answering questions and getting to know someone that way, and once I build up the confidence I’ll obviously ask you questions. It’s the same with a first meet - I’d rather the Dom take the lead - I’d rather we meet somewhere quiet and NOT to local to me, somewhere where we can get to know each other without the anxiety of loads of people, lots of noise, etc.

When I get very shy/anxious I often find writing things down helps. You’ll be able to tell when I’m nervous and struggling because I’ll go very quiet.

Despite how quiet and nervous I may come across at first, it’s important to know that unless I say otherwise (which I will) that I AM interested and wanting this. I know that it can probably be a bit off putting or even come across as rude that I’m not showing interest, but It takes me time to feel comfortable enough with someone to take my guard down.

With the last older guy (the guy who introduced me to kink) I was seeing he was brilliant with me, I never felt any pressure, it was very relaxed (despite him being in control). Once he got to know me and my quirks, and we got to a stage where I was comfortable, he would drive to me to pick me up and take me back to his house (an hour there and back, bless him!), once we’d get to his he’d always remind me that there’s no pressure, and make sure I am comfortable, he has a little dog that I’d spend a little time with, we’d have a drink together and catch up, then he’d ask if I’d like to follow him up to his room… again he’d make sure I’m comfortable and then take the lead, but regularly checking in. Regular check ins are important, as is open communication, and always being honest with each other. He’d always try and give me a very loose idea of what to expect. The sex was ALWAYS amazing, honestly no guy (not that there’s been many 😅) has ever been able to make me cum other than him. The blindfolds, gags, restraints, riding crop and all the sensations… they felt soo good!

I think that covers most of it, but if you have any questions please feel free to ask.

~ M x