Welcome:

I figured it may be helpful to write a bit of an introduction, so here goes! I have been on and off of here for a little over a year now and although I have made some genuine friendships on here, I am still yet to find what/who I’ve been looking for. I sometimes feel like it may be time to give up on my search, or that I am being too picky, but then I remind myself that it’s perfectly okay to be picky (especially with something like this), and that there’s absolutely no rush. So, the search continues! This intro is somewhat long, I do apologise for that, but I wanted to be as clear as possible about what I’m looking for, as well as sharing a bit about me. Maybe grab a drink or two... I appreciate how long it is, but I hope it’ll be worth the read.

What I am NOT looking for:

I thought it may be best to start with what I am NOT looking for, as hopefully it’ll save time for those reading this who are looking for something I am not. I am have NO interests in the following: online dynamics (of any kind), married men, younger men, joining a couple, a sub, to switch, DDLG/age play, photographers offering their services, finding a ‘Daddy’ and dick pics, please NO dick pics (instant block)!
I am sure that you are all lovely people, but the above are just not what I am looking for.

About Me:

Vanilla me:

I am 25 years old, single, straight and live alone in a quiet little village. I work part time, love socialising with my friends and family. I enjoy cooking/baking, long country walks, travelling, and listening to music… November Rain is my favourite song! I used to work for local radio, so have a strong passion for music. I am into all the old stuff, nothing new. I enjoy watching classic comedies, crime dramas and horrors (admittedly I do Google where the jump scares are when I am watching a horror alone, aha). I have a somewhat dry and at times dark sense of humour, my friends would probably describe me as quirky and definitely honest (maybe too honest at times).

Physically:

I am 5'3, white (very pale), curvy, have long auburn hair, hazel eyes, and I often wear glasses. I also have small boobs (super sensitive nipples), hehe. I am a bit of a plain Jane, tbh. I rarely wear make up, and I am happier in leggings and a big long jumper than I am in overly revealing clothes.

Something you should know...

I am happy and content in my life, but there’s a side to me that I haven’t had much chance to explore and I am on here to hopefully change that. But before I get into that there’s something I would like to share… I am autistic. No, this does NOT hold me back in life. I am able to mask very well, and although there can be some bad days here and there, I manage. I can and often do get somewhat anxious when meeting or even speaking with new people and visiting unfamiliar areas, but I am still able to manage this. I just need a bit of time. It’s important for me to build trust and feel comfortable with someone before meeting them in person. I want to be clear that I do have the full mental capacity to understand what BDSM is and the risks that can come with it. I am not ‘vulnerable’ and you would not be taking advantage (in that sense at least, hehe). I sometimes wonder if my autism plays a part in my interest in kink… the routine, the structure, the rules. Who knows.

Kink me:

For as long as I can remember I have always been drawn to kink, even before I knew what kink actually was I'd find myself having thoughts of wanting to be tied up, to be hurt, to follow orders. I've had several vanilla relationships and although they've been fulfilling in some areas, it's always felt like there's been something missing. Control.

A couple of years ago I began seeing an older man on and off, although he wasn’t a Dom he did let me explore my submissive side, he had some toys and restraints. During our times together (after a lot of trust was built) he used restraints on me, blindfolds, teased me with orgasm control and denial, spanked me, used a riding crop on me and we had rougher sex. Although it was still quite tame, it was the best sexual experiences I’d ever had. And it’s left me wanting more!

I no longer find purely vanilla relationships enjoyable, and am now in a place where I want to fully explore my submissive side within a D/s dynamic...

What I AM looking for:

I am looking for an experienced Dominant/Sadist to guide me on my submissive journey, and to hopefully enter a longterm D/s dynamic with. I am looking for a dynamic where I can (over time) fully submit to my Dom. A dynamic with rules, structure and punishments when needed, a dynamic that is present outside the bedroom during every day life, even subtly. I want to get to a point where I can fully submit to a Dom and hand over control to him. I am looking for a dynamic, not necessarily a romantic relationship.

There are many, many kinks that I would LOVE to explore in a safe environment with the right Dom, including:

~ impact play
~ breath play/choking
~ edge/fear play
~ restraints
~ edging
~ humiliation
~ nipple play/torture (I have incredibly sensitive nipples)!
~ name calling
~ CNC/abduction play
~ orgasm control/denial
~ TPE (eventually)

And much more. I know some of my kinks are somewhat extreme for a newbie, but I see myself as a bit of masochist, and want to explore my tolerance to pain. And obviously I’d only engage in the kinks once there has been a lot of trust established between myself and my Dom. I am not expecting any of these things straight away, and appreciate it takes time.

I do have hard limits, and hope you do too. These include: anything illegal, blood, permanent injury/damage, scat, vomit, pet play, age play, latex/leather, online dynamics, DDLG and snapchat. And there may be some hard/soft limits that I am yet to discover.

WHO I am looking for:

As I mentioned above, I am looking for an EXPERIENCED Dom to guide and train me on this journey. Please be fully single as I have no interest in getting involved with married or partnered up men (even if your partner is okay with it). I do prefer older guys (age range - 29-55, love a DILF). I am looking for a Dom who would be willing to take time to go at a steady pace while training me, as I’ve mentioned it does take me time to warm to people and feel comfortable, so I’m not looking to rush this. A Dom who is respectful, genuine, caring, and strict when needed, preferably with a sadistic streak. Physically I like guys who are take care of themselves, are tall, preferably have a full head of hair, and full set of teeth. I do like guys who are strong both physically and mentally. Personal hygiene is an obvious must. I don’t mind if you have children, but I do NOT want children of my own, that’s a decision I made a long time ago, and am not prepared to change.

Some Final Points:

~ With regards to my autism, although I do live alone I would never feel comfortable hosting at mine. I have spent a lot of time making my house my 'safe space', I rarely even let my friends or family over. Ideally, I would prefer it if the Dom were able to host, as hotels can add a bit of extra anxiety, but if for whatever reason you are unable or not comfortable with hosting, I would consider hotels.

~ I am currently learning to drive, it actually feels like I have been learning to drive forever now, but getting a test at the moment is somewhat impossible. I did have a test booked just before Christmas, but I had to cancel due to being ill, ugh. I am collecting a new car in a few weeks so will somehow be the owner of 2 cars before even passing my test... ha! Anyway, the reason I am mentioning this is because I don't do trains, busses, or taxies on my own, at least I really struggle to I would if I absolutely had to, but it's not a fun experience for me. I am hoping to pass my test very soon, but before then arranging a meet may be tricky, but hopefully doable.

~ In terms of moving forward, if we gel on here I'd be happy to move to either WhatsApp or telegram (I'm not on anything else - the likes of Snapchat and KIK are hard limits for me). As for phone calls, I would be happy to do this once we've got to know each other a bit, but do be warned... I will be very shy and quiet to begin with.

~ I am not comfortable sharing face pictures until there's been some trust built between us, so face pics won't be instant, please do not hound me for them after a few messages.

~ I am NOT looking for one off encounters or something short term. I'd ideally like this to be an ongoing long term dynamic.

~ Nothing makes me cringe more than messages such as ‘hey baby/sexy’, ‘mmmm’ or ‘let me be ur (spelt like that 😑) daddy’. No. Just no. I’m sure you mean well, but I won’t be responding. I’m more likely to respond if you actually converse, tell me a little bit about yourself, show me you’ve read my profile. Just a ‘hey’ doesn’t give me much to go off.

The End... (at last).

I think that pretty much covers everything. Congratulations if you've made it to the end without falling asleep. If I haven't put you off, then please do feel free to message me! I am not on here a lot so I may take a day or so to respond, though I don't tend to respond to one word messages, and I certainly don't respond to dick pics or sex chat.

(I am on 'Fetlife' and this is a copy/paste from my profile on there. I have some pictures and more writings on FL - _shysub_)

I hope to hear from you

~ M x