I get it. You've seen the photos. Yes she has an amazing ass. You can't stop thinking about it and you've got to touch it. It's all good. I love to share her. But there are a few things you should know if you want to shoot your shot...

** The first message... please include your name, where you live, how tall you are, a face picture, body picture... you're looking for a free good time with a sexy woman. Put in some effort. You're not paying for anything...

.1. She's 5'-11" and has curves. She likes guys with meat on the bones and taller than 5'-10". She doesn't like bending down to kiss you and feeling like you're the beauty and she's the beast. It's not going to happen.

.2. She likes guys who are above average in length and girth. That's what she gets at home and she's not willing to settle for less. It is what it is. I'm sorry. Or not.

.3. Know how a map works. We live between Sacramento and Tahoe on the 50 side. We're not going to drive 2 hours to meet you. We prefer to keep it to an hour drive or less. How far you want to drive is up to you. See number 4.

.4. She's picky and wants what she wants. We're not going to show up and just start banging with you. She likes to meet in person first. Establish chemistry. Chat online some and get to know you because we like to get to know you! One and done or a variety of dick isn't the goal. She likes quality over quantity.

.5. Know what you're getting in to. In a month we probably talk to 20 guys. There are many months that none make it to bed with her. Coffee doesn't work out. Schedule doesn't align. Personalities don't mesh. Lots of things can throw a monkey wrench in it. So be prepared. But if you do make it... number 6 awaits.

.6. If you manage to get her to say yes to getting naked, the first time or times are likely to be mfm settings because she likes dick. She likes having more than one dick to play with. Like. A lot. We like the build up. We like pictures. We like videos. And you're volunteering to be part of it!

Basically what I'm saying is that most likely it's not going to happen. But with you ... it might.