1st Been feeling down, I write poetry or short stories, on the struggle I go through and my experience also my love life and sometimes, I also write them for people and friends and family too, when I’m feeling down, or I feel like picking up my phone and type something out. -but lately I haven’t been in deep depression since my break up with my ex girlfriend, me and her weren’t together for so long(9 months) we kinds rushed our relationship but I loved every second of it, but she was a big part of my life, but then she had feeling for this other guy 6 months in our relationship and I ignored it, because I knew she loved me and cared about me, Her mother (she was homophobic, person ) she didn’t like me and my girlfriend were dating and she didn’t like that her daughter was gay and she didn’t believe it, her father was a really kind and gentle man, but there were some more trouble that went through but don’t need to give detail but what I can say it causes a lot of hurt in me, but I ignored because I loved her and I didn’t care what her mother or other people where saying about my relationship with with her, because If you gonna say something mean about me say it to my face and action speak louder then words and even tho my ex girlfriend helped me get out 4 yrs relationship with my abusive (physically and mentally) toxic ex boyfriend which help me big time. Yes me and my ex girlfriend are still friend but we barely talk which is sad because I still loved her even after everything went through but I knew I had to move on and all my friend told me I should. But it really hard and it been a struggle for me and her but now that we’re not together we can work on ourselves and not each other, I told her it will be hard and it will but she didn’t support me in the way I wanted in the relationship she said she would work on it and be better and work on herself and Buttt… I now gonna say anymore about my trouble on my past because cause still a lot of trauma and shakes in my hands.

my anxiety and depression, is just not good, but I am trying my best to keep strong, because I have something really special to live for…..❤️❤️ also remember I have my family and my loved ones by my side and a beautiful community.

It getting colder now and I want cuddles and hugs, ❤️🥺and a new girls and boys group of friends to go get drinks or to hangout with.

2nd I’m thinking bad again about myself, my appearance, and my self esteem, when I know I shouldn’t be having these negative thoughts, but I have depression and anxiety so the thoughts are there.

1. I don’t know why I’m being so open about mental illness, maybe because I found and met some really wonderful friends and acquaintances online and offline and over video chat too. I can also be more of myself around the people I care about.

4th problem(not really problem idk 🤣😛😂) I live with my mother and brother (for now) until I get my own apartment just need to save money 💰. My family who does support me in my mission on being a mommy(know about what I do and there accepting, which is a relief and so breathtaking and happy and supportive of them both to let me be a mommy. It make me happy. And proud, to be doing the work I do. I makes me happy because I get give advice and support. 😊😊

😂 but enough about that😛: so some helpful tips and advice I can give you is this: you know how your mind fools into thinking you bad person, and you have negative feelings and thoughts and sometime I just think I’m not good mommy, when let’s be real nobody perfect. We all make mistakes and we all have a struggles we go through our beautiful life. Helpful tip and advice is : 1st Don’t bottle up your emotions 2nd talk to someone, (it can be a close friend, a schools guidance counselor, parents, grandparents, siblings, mothers and fathers, and your therapist or the The suicide hotline if it gets that far or bad, ) I also tell all my friends and acquaintances that I’m always there for them and you can also tell me anything I’m an open book and I won’t judge. Just be who you are.

I learned in my last relationship that don’t put all your apples In one basket, and all your energy, your time and money, into the person. It can be hard to let go of that toxic or stressful person in are life’s, when we know we all had one, but with hope and guidance you can do it, and advice from people then you have no need to worry.

exceptions: littles, son, daughter, baby, loved ones, our family, and our grandparents and aunts and uncle’s, children, not gonna forget our animals and pets. They are all the best things in our life’s. And we spoil our loved ones who ever they are.

my last relationship was not a fairytale I wanted. It was not some princess movie they I could read and it happens okay, but what I was saying before nobody perfect, you learn from your mistakes and your past relationships or marriages too..… I learned if you can do one good deed or something fun and useful, then your in good hands. Or if you can help someone out. Doesn’t have to be big. And make there day great or better then your set. It can easy as doing chores from parents or a neighbor, or just donating to a local animal shelter or Volenteering…. Some skills I learned in life.

Coping skills you can uses 1. 4 square breathing 2. Talking to littles (It makes me happy 😊) and I have a big heart 3. Play with your little
5. Watching cartoons 6. Drawing. 7. Singgggging to your self or your family 8. Play with pets or foster pets 9. Invite people over to hangout /cuddle/ go to movies 10. Think happy thoughts 11. Poetry 12. Meditation 13. Re-balance Work and Home. 14. Build in Regular Exercise. 15. Eat Well and Limit Alcohol and Stimulants, 16. Connect with Supportive People. 17. Carve out Hobby Time. 18. Practice Meditation, Stress Reduction or Yoga. 19. Sleep Enough. 20. Bond with Your Pet. 21. Volenteer at a local shelter or rescues 22. Say positive stuff (out loud) in the mirror every morning to boost you confidence 23. Take breaks to de-stress or get away from negative thing that is happening 24. Be yourself 25. Be brave 26. Be awesome 😎 27. Remember you have friend and family by your side to guide you and help 28. Limited intake on drugs 29. Call up or FaceTime a Close friend 30. Don’t forget to breath and drink water 31. Go on walk 32. Draw or color 33. If you work full time or part time take a vacation and rest

If this helps your good hands because when your going through a hard time always know you have people/family/mommies/daddies/littles/ parents/siblings/grandparents/uncles/ pets….. DON’T FORGET we all love you and that we are proud of you, and cares about you and that you are beautiful/handsome who ever you are inside and out.

Ps I’m sorry for venting, it been a week of stress on and off and heartbreak and crying. * hugs 🤗 and kisses 😘 * to everybody I LOVE YOUUU ❤️‍🔥❤️🥰😍