A lot is happening to me internally lately, I think. I have been wanting to write, but nothing is coming to me. My mood has just been too horrible after what happened awhile ago. And, I was feeling motivation to do something, but when the time came the first day(yesterday), I was unable to record due to roommates. Then today came, and I primed my voice, I practiced in the car some otw home, and I put forth the mental effort to try. To try and improv a scenario based heavily on my first draft that I wrote. And it came together nicely in some ways, but I got stage fright or something and just clammed-up sometimes. I think there was too much going on in my head and it was hard to focus.

After about an hour, I would have gotten through 10 minutes of a script, and I had just gotten to the critical point in the improv, but that fire wasn't there. And then after I sat and stewed for a bit, my roommate was calling out to me to see if she could turn on the TV and I was done recording. I was basically like, "this aint gonna happen. I'll just try and read from my own script later, but for now there's a shorter, simpler script that I really enjoyed that I could fill." So, I informed her and then hopped on, excited to produce SOMETHING in like the past 2 weeks or so.

And then I got the message pastebin.com Bad Gateway and I was like...no way. I hope it's not down forever but like, seriously? I work so much. (7 nights/mornings, and now 4-6 afternoons a week on top of that) The bit of joy I get within myself is from filling scripts and I get like only a couple hours total a week to work on anything. A bunch of other things getting me down, too; that ive either already said or I really dont feel like saying.