In my last relationship, I was super avoidant. I realized the reversed dynamic when I was reading this article which I found through this sub. It made me start wondering if maybe I don't have any TF at all and I'm just supposed to learn the karmic lesson of codependency from water signs in general (I'm Aquarius, ex-GF is Cancer, DM is Pisces). I was trying to lean into that theory for my own sanity (I'm trying to detach) but ultimately, I do still believe he's my TF.

After even more thinking, I remembered he told me he had been chasing someone prior to our last period of communication. He told me the story about how he had been rejected by someone else he was really into during our last conversation before separation. He felt bad for putting me through the same thing to me that happened to him.

It almost feels like the Universe was preparing me for the misery of being a chaser by showing me that the grass isn't actually greener on the other side. I was in serious distress in my quasi-running phase with my ex and I wouldn't wish the discomfort of avoidance on anyone.

Does anyone have similar experiences?