What do you think of the state of our options with bottom surgery? Honestly I feel like I’ve done so much research over the years and I know that getting PHALLO would be my best option but if I get it I know I’d kill myself, I can’t stomach the thought of getting my arm skin or another part of my body made into a makeshift penis. I can’t imagine having to look down and it. Having to bend it to make it seem like an “erection” but it’s only a metal rod. I can’t cum like a cis guy. It honestly make me feel like it’s a slap in the face to being trans. I hate being trans. I wish I was just born cis. I feel like it’s a fucking punishment. And I know there’s no way in my lifetime they will ever invent something that actually works like a cis one. I can’t have my own kids. I just want a biological one but lucky for me I was born with the set of chromosomes that can’t produce both sexes. I feel like there’s no reason to stay. Because there’s nothing that’s ever going to make me truly happy except being happy with myself but I can’t do that because I can’t even feel at home in my fucking body and there’s nothing on this planet that could fix that.

EDIT: YALL IN THE COMMENTS OBVIOUSLY DIDNT READ I HAVE DONE MY RESEARCH AND TALKED TO A BUNCH OF DIFFERENT PEOPLE WHO HAVE DO PHALLO. I am aware of what exactly comes with PHALLO which is how I know that it would make me feel more dysphoric and y’all telling me I’m wrong for feeling this way if fucked up and making me feel more like shit. Just because I would feel more dysphoric by getting PHALLO because I can’t even get erect on my own and it really doesn’t look like a cis penis just about as good as they can do makes me wanna FUCKING KILL MYSELF AND THATS ALL YALL ARE MAKING ME FEEL LIKE. Y’ALL ARE MAKING ME WANNA KILL MYSELF MORE BECAUSE ITS OBVIOUS IM THE ONLY ONE WHO FUCKING FEELS LIKE THIS.