Let me start out with I live in Enfield Connecticut. I have severe social anxiety and depression and I might even be diagnosed as bipolar(therapist is looking for second opinion)

I find smoking helps me feel happy, whether it's a falsified feeling or not is solely opinion based, it helps me go simple places like the crowded grocery store or even the mall. But sadly it's still considered taboo and frowned upon, this makes it especially hard to come by combined with my social issues and lack of friend making skills and ultimately forces me to live miserably and without the one thing that seems to help me effectively.

It's gotten to the point where it is frustrating to even try to live with this mental state. I no longer know what to do and it's literally driving me nuts.

Thank you for listening to my rant, it's good to let things out every now and again.