I'm making this post to be brutally honest and to get this off my chest- I think I made a stupid decision and I feel guilty for it.

I (21F) went to New York with a man I had met twice at clubs in my city. He seemed like a nice guy and did not want any sexual favors; purely friendship. The first few days were good actually but on my last night I had met a person that I invited to the bars with us. I believe this was the person to roofie me- what followed is a recount from the man I went with. I seemed like I had become very drunk out of nowhere, the roofie person was hanging on me and touching me quite a bit, man I came with asked if I wanted to ditch the stranger, I said yes. Apparently, we left the bar and I wanted to go home but once home I wanted to have a drink. I came to with the man I came with inside of me and presumably blacked out again.

The next morning I woke up and believed I had drank too much but slowly put the pieces together and realized I was hardly tipsy when arriving to the bar. I blame the person who roofied me for doing such an evil thing but I also blame myself and the man I came with. I believe that I should've been smarter than going on a trip like this (I don't think the man I came with pressured me into sex he may have just complied with my advances?) but I also feel like he should've known better than to sleep with someone much younger than he/much drunker.

I feel sad and mad and dirty and I keep getting flashbacks from it. If anyone else has any similar story or advice I'd love to hear it.