I've been practicing BDSM in-person for 20 years and have a lot of experience with trauma victims. Sexual assault, verbal abuse, physical abuse, survivors guilt, death of partners, low self worth, no purpose in life. Many people come to kink with trauma seeking one of three things:

• To clear the nightmares. They want to do dirty and dark things while having a safeword so this time they feel in control and safe. These positive experiences help unwind the mental and emotional knots so the trauma can heal, the triggers can fade and the nightmares go away.
• To indulge in new kinks. A lot of trauma leaves new needs. Being used like a sexual toy. Being hurt physically. Being controlled. Being bound. Being torn down emotionally. These new needs
• To indulge in the trauma itself. You don't just want to explore kinks - you want to explore the entire experience you had. All those feelings, the headspace, the things that were done to you. It hurts but it also makes you feel alive. Maybe it makes you feel wanted and desired. Sometimes you want to go further, see how far down the hole you can go.

Shoot me a message if you want to chat about the cross over between trauma and BDSM. And if you don't know where to start, here are a few good openers.

• Share your trauma. I'll share the most similar truama/BDSM example I have
• Have new kinks from your trauma? Happy to answer questions about those kinks from safety to how I like to twist them for my own enjoyment
• What is an emotional and mental sadist? I get hard when someone cries. But what else does it involve?
• Have an urge to do things in-person that involve BDSM and trauma? Let's talk about how to make that happen

Damon