Tantrums collection embroidered size M jacket. 100% cotton. Machine wash cold, tumble dry low. Swap for a new Helikon Women's Urban Tactical Skirt, black W34". I have the same skirt in camogrom so I know it'll fit.

Guatemalan handmade embroidered large petite jacket. 100% cotton. Wash cold, cool dry. Bottom button included, needs to be sewn back on. Swap for a like-new med-reg camogrom (preferably to match my camogrom skirt) or multicam coat (example below) with fold-down collar style.

Painted Pony size M knit blazer. 100% cotton. Dry clean only. Swap for new pair of name-brand solid black booty shorts that will fit a 34-36 inch waist & hip & completely prevent genitalia escape.

Linda Allard Ellen Tracy size 6 blazer. 97% cotton, 3% spandex. Dry clean only. Swap for a solid dark color nylon (spandex optional) short wrap skirt that will fit a 34-36 inch waist & hip. Doesn't have to be new, but must be defect-free.

Chico's size 2 quilted denim jacket. Shell 100% cotton, lining 100% polyester, filling 100% polyester. Machine wash cold, tumble dry low, may be dry cleaned. Swap for a new cotton/spandex, nylon, linen? sleeveless collared button-down top, not distressed, neutral or darker colors, not white. Or maybe a floral/Hawaiian print I like. 36 inch chest.

Loft ruffle cuff size M jacket. New with tag. 65% linen, 35% cotton. Machine wash cold, line dry. Style 459807. Swap for a new cotton/spandex, nylon, linen? sleeveless collared button-down top, not distressed, neutral or darker colors, not white. Or maybe a floral/Hawaiian print I like. 36 inch chest.

Liz Claiborne women's denim jacket - XL. Not too worn, all zippers work fine. Swap for a new cotton/spandex, nylon, linen? sleeveless collared button-down top, not distressed, neutral or darker colors, not white. Or maybe a floral/Hawaiian print I like. 36 inch chest.

Izod women's size M jean jacket with striped trim. 99% cotton, 1% spandex. Machine wash cold gentle. Missing bottom button. Swap for new 3 inch sport boxer briefs, solid black, cotton & spandex only, must fit 34-36 inch waist & hip.

Aeropostale hoodie. Size L/G. Lightly worn. Swap for a solid dark color nylon (spandex optional) short wrap skirt that will fit a 34-36 inch waist & hip. Doesn't have to be new, but must be defect-free.

Young USA size XL button zip hoodie. Like-new. 100% polyester. Machine wash cold, tumble dry low. Swap for a new athletic dress, short-sleeve or sleeveless (not tank or racerback) with undershort, black or maybe a floral/Hawaiian print I like. 36 inch chest, 34-36 inch waist & hip.

Nike NY Knicks size XL hoodie. 80% cotton, 20% polyester. Machine wash warm, tumble dry low. Swap for a new athletic dress, short-sleeve or sleeveless (not tank or racerback) with undershort, black or maybe a floral/Hawaiian print I like. 36 inch chest, 34-36 inch waist & hip.

Cloth Logic size XXL wool blend peacoat. Probably not worn enough to be drycleaned for the first time, since it doesn't smell like drycleaner or much of anything. Shell: 60% wool, 40% viscose. Lining: 100% cotton. Dry clean only. Swap for a new athletic dress, short-sleeve or sleeveless (not tank or racerback) with undershort, black or maybe a floral/Hawaiian print I like. 36 inch chest, 34-36 inch waist & hip.

Dark gray with pinstripes. About 25 inches laid flat across the lowest button/pocket line. No other measurements will be provided, since this is a tailor job. Dry clean. Swap for a new athletic dress, short-sleeve or sleeveless (not tank or racerback) with undershort, black or maybe a floral/Hawaiian print I like. 36 inch chest, 34-36 inch waist & hip.

Propper XL-regular multicam coat. 65% polyester/35% cotton like-new. Height: 67 to 71 in. Chest: above 41 in. Swap for a like-new flame-resistant one in medium-regular or large-regular, no insect repellent, with same fold-down collar style, camogrom (preferably to match my camogrom skirt), or multicam.

Have any swap offers I won't want to refuse? Including but not limited to needle piercing titanium jewelry by a reputable shop/piercer?

Who pays shipping may vary depending on how swap is completed by each side.