My mum, "I know it's unreasonable, but could you consider dressing a bit more neutrally while they're here. It'll make them feel less anxious" (obviously paraphrasing a little). And she doesn't think it's unreasonable, to be clear, if she thought she could get away with it I'd never dress feminine at all.

But THEY feel anxious? Last time they came it was like I was back in the fucking closet again. I holed myself up in my room the whole time. I feel like shit when I'm in the same room as them. They're not anxious, they're closed minded and don't care enough about me to challenge their worldviews. They don't need placating, they need to grow the fuck up, just like my parents do.