I (18 mtf) am in a very tricky spot when it comes to starting estrogen and my parents. When I first told them, it was pretty messy. I had to tell them I was trans over the phone because I was in school at the time, debating on whether I should start hormones now or wait until April to go through planned parenthood (this was in november, so that was way too long of a wait for me.) My parents screamed at me, cried, told me I had no idea if this would help me, and doubted me in every way. This was the second time I told them I was trans (first time I expressed my interest in dressing differently and told them I went by they/them pronouns.) (I now use she/her, and throughout my entire life, they've not once used anything other than he/him.)

A couple days later, they came up and sat me down for dinner, telling me they would help me with my transition. Crazy switch!! and though I had my doubts, i expressed to them how important this was to me, and that this transition had to be their priority. I told them that I can't wait for them to process this before I take the steps toward my own happiness.

Cut to now, my parents constantly tell me that my depression is clouding my view, that I'm NOT 100% sure I want this, and that this is so emotionally hard for them. Its very frustrating, and I don't know whether to keep putting up with my parents, or take matters into my own hands and start Plume. No matter how hard I try to tell my parents that I know myself, I know this is right for me, that I am suffering right now, and that I am more than willing to help them understand While I start the process of bettering myself, they constantly go back to doubting my confidence. I really need help. We have an appointment with a doctor 2 months out, and when i suggested we go to an inclusive clinic that has appointments available in 2 weeks, my mom screamed at me and started crying about how hard this is for them.

While this is very very hard for me to handle, I know that my mom simply just doesn't understand. No matter how hard I try to reassure her and my father, they just won't make the effort to listen and trust me. I am trying to do everything I can to try and help them, but at the same time, I can't let that put my happiness on the backburner. What do i do?