I'll scramble the info b/c idk who's gonna see it.

I'm socially awkward and I have some mental issues that I need to sort through. It has not been a good year at all for me so that kind of sharpened the underlying mental problems. None of these are valid excuses for what I did and I still feel bad.

I was invited to an acquaintance's NYE party. In the past I've avoided these because I'm awkward around new people but I've been trying to crack that shell so I decided to suck it up and go. Things started going well and I had some fun but everybody broke off into their cliques and I was pretty much alone and isolated. Just feeling that I wasn't wanted there and only invited as a courtesy invite kind of triggered an anxiety attack and I thought it would be best to leave. Buses were running late, wasn't too cold and bus stop was like a 5 minute walk away and it was only 3 stops away. So I thanked the host for inviting me and prepared to leave. The whole party seemed to gang up on me saying "stay for the countdown!" Just having people pressuring me kind of made things feel worse so I said "you guys have fun, don't worry, I didn't drink too much and the buses are still running." But one of the people insisted on driving me home. I kept saying "no, you stay I'm fine."

Bless her, she just wanted me to be safe so I gave in. Into the car at 11:51. I did a quick check and my place and back was about 15 minutes. I insisted she stay and not miss midnight. She said it was fine. So I got home and just went to sleep.

Then I heard about what had happened.

The girl who drove me home got there 6 minutes past midnight. Her BF was planning to propose at 0:00. But since she was driving me back, she missed it. The BF had a full on meltdown screaming at her for prioritizing a stranger's safety and not letting me walk home like I insisted.

I got her number from my acquaintance and apologized to her and the BF. They accepted my apology and I heard they got engaged last week. But I still feel like shit.

TL;DR TIFU by trying to leave a NYE party at 11:55pm with people who are effectively strangers, getting offered a ride by one of the ladies there (I live close by so my plan was just to walk home and calm down) , she missed the countdown and her BF's proposal cause him to have a breakdown in front of their friends.

E: 11:50 not 11:55.