Life is not easy but it's a lot better without therapy. I had many mental breakdowns through this time and mostly nowadays I am struggling with feelings towards a girl. While I was in therapy usually something like this come and when I share that with therapist..he mocks me and say like"go talk to her" like a easy way..I am sure he never did that but acted like it.. whatever this type of gasighting ruined many years of my life and I was able to stay away from nicotine for a pretty long time during this time. And tbh I am taking buoroin tto deal with addiction. But whatever I never plan to see a psycologist ,anyway. The centre always forcily sent you to psycologist but I really don't want that to happen..