I was in a pretty serious relationship with this girl for about 3 years. (This isn’t including the time I’ve know her we’ve dated before) but within those 3 years we were so intimate and inseparable. She’s taught me so much about myself and always given me new perspectives on life as a whole . Normally under any other circumstance when it comes to losing a girlfriend or a friend In general it’s pretty easy if not I’m always the one ready to burn that bridge. But when it came to breaking up with this one girl it’s was the most painful thing. We saw our relationship becoming toxic and we mutually came up with the idea that we would have to leave eachother . But I couldn’t help the idea of losing her. Long story short we break up and I go into a downward spiral of depression. She didn’t want to talk for a long time after . I couldn’t get myself to see other women nor entertain them sexually it was all so clouded. Being that it’s been 4 years since the break up I’ve definitely come a long way but I feel almost traumatized about the whole situation in general. I’ve never been so involved in another persons life where things felt as if I couldn’t live / focus without them. There isn’t anything she could do that would upset me . We’ve been through so much together I’d really like the idea to keep in touch with her because we are actually good friends still. But it hurts my chest because I never stopped loving her, I’d do anything to make this all go away .