To put it in the most simple way possible... I don't know how to be authentically vulnerable with other therapists/supervisors - and I find that incredibly sad and isolating.

I feel I can only be truly vulnerable with my own therapist. I'm sure part of it is my own cognitions, but there's also this 'work environment' framework that tends to get in the way.

In a weird way, I'm starting to feel a bit jaded towards my supervisors and other therapists who try to ask me how I'm doing. It's like there's this inner-group belief that we are all very empathetic and so we care about eachother and want to authentically 'check-in', but none of us can actually do it because we 'need to be professional' and our coworkers are not our clients. So on one hand, I feel a push to be authentically vulnerable with my coworkers because, hey, they're asking authentically, right? They're therapists after all!But then again, that's my boss. I can't exactly divulge that I'm literally on the edge and I can barely make it to work because then they have to consider the economic implications my mental health could be causing. I also dont want to ruin potential networking opportunities or scare away referrals because coworkers think im unhinged.

This has been one of my hardest years in a very long time. I've been scraping by. Many of us are in the same boat. I'm in therapy working on it. But at the times in my life where I wish I could rely on others - specifically, MY people... I can't. There's too much at stake.