Without writing a mini book, started listening to a couple episodes of the podcast. Practically grew up in several churches from about two or three into my thirties, but haven't been to a church in a few years for a few reasons; volunteered for many (10 ) years but felt used, constantly giving but never receiving any growth spiritually. I never really connected with the people or the "click" culture (I'm also introverted and have trust issues, which doesn't help), and ALWAYS felt a disconnect between religion, God and myself.

I'm not sure I ever want to step foot in a church again and I'm not doubting the existence of God, I'm simply not sure I believe God.

Right now I'm feeling like I'm wandering around a desert looking for water and finding only sand with no prospects on the horizon, no mirage to chase after.

So I'm looking for a place to start and could use some guidance.

~J