This past week some friends got together for a childhood friend that’s moving and we got a big house around a lake for 5 days. Everyone is having fun at this house, but notice I still get triggered. One of my good friends came out of the hot tub with his trunks riding up and one of his testicles was hanging out from the bottom. I heard people laughing so I turned around. He said something to the effect of ‘are you laughing cuz my ball is hanging out or because you think I have one’ he then reaches and takes them both out and yells ‘hell yeah I have 2 balls.’

Granted, he was drinking and not directing the comments toward me and he doesn’t know I’m a survivor. At that moment, I stopped having fun and really just wanted to leave. A few people asked if I was ok, because my demeanor changed. No one equated what he said to me, but I don’t know why that was so triggering.

I think I got triggered because if that happened to me, I wouldn’t have another one to pull out or because a group of people I care about were laughing at the possibility that he could have one ball?

Is this harder for people are not open with everyone or are body image issues an issue for everyone.