User: I don't have any of my network drives.

Me: OK, let's start with a reboot.

User: (5 seconds later) OK, done, now what?

Me: You rebooted your machine that fast?

User: Yeah, it's one of the newer ones, so it's pretty fast.

Me: Sir, computers do not reboot that fast, please start with a reboot so that we can see if that fixes the issue.

User: I told you I already did that.

Me: OK, hang on a second. [At this point I just sent a shutdown over the network]

User: What's going on, my computer just turned off.

Me: The first step of the process is to start with a reboot, and since there seemed to be a problem with the one you just did, I just forced another one just to be sure.

User: If that was actually gonna fix it, I would have rebooted it, but I already know that won't do anything. I have had this problem before and there is something you have to do to the server to fix it, there is nothing wrong with my machine.

(Mind you, we have about 80 servers)

Me: OK, when the PC comes back up please login.

User: (After about minute) fine, whatever, now what?

Me: Are your network drives back now?

User: Yeah they're there, see I told you, all you had to do was fix the server. Thanks, bye. - quick hang up

Twats, fucking twats everywhere.