I had only one SR till date and we ended a few months ago. It didn’t end well. We had been dragging it for a few months. She was a borderline narcissist and I got way too attached to her that even till date (although we are not talking anymore for many weeks now), I am unable to get over her. It’s not that I want her desperately back, in fact, I am not even looking to get back with her. But this whole experience has left me with bad scars that I am finding to get over with. I tried therapy for a couple months now every week, spent time with family and friends and try to keep myself busy but the episodes of those experiences keep coming back. I even look at sex very differently now in not so good way anymore. Yes, she controlled me badly, she showed me carrots with her over sexual nature but would not provide me the actual experience and I kept hoping it will happen one day and kept funding her life in hope until it ended badly, and I am now finding myself not even enjoying talking about sex. And how much I spent on her - a lot, like five figures dollars every month. I know I made many mistake and ignored many red flags, may be I’m not meant for this lifestyle. But for now, my priority is to get over thoughts of her and those bad memories. What else I can do as the above efforts haven’t worked so far? Any advice?