pretty self explanatory. met him on seeking. i told him my boundaries that i want to meet in public and establish a connection first before any intimacy. he insisted we should meet in a hotel room to just talk to get to know each other and will not touch me unless I stated otherwise.

well he lied, when i got there couple minutes after he started kissing me. it feels so forced to me because i dont want to offend him, but it was clear i was pushing him away. i kept asking him about how he’s going to do the part of the deal that i want, but kept gaslighting me that i have to “earn” it before he gives what i want so it wouldnt be “transactional”. i know it shouldn’t have been that way. he kept gaslighting me and i was very wary of the lies that were coming out of his mouth, but i couldnt stand up for myself. it was clear in my body language that i was very uncomfortable, i refuse to kiss him or do the deed, but he kept on commanding me to do stuff.

last straw was when he forced his thing in my other hole which I told him initially that would be my limit. I kept pushing him away until I shouted no and that’s when he pulled out. I got to the bathroom and was crying as to what I’ve gotten myself into. In the end he gave me a smaller amount than i expected and got out of the room as fast as i could.

he wanted it to be a weekly thing, but i dont think i can handle it anymore. i never wanted intimacy in the first place. surprisingly he didnt block me yet, thinking everything was still ok. i want to try gain something out from him as per what he said he can give what i want but i have to be realistic. today i asked him if he could give me some spending money for my shopping tomorrow, and this is what he said

“We established a relationship first. Not after a first date. Hmm this isn’t what I was hoping you’d be like tbh”

first date = sex? absolute bs. im not stupid i was aware of everything in the first place, but it could be really scary i didnt know how to protect myself so i couldnt stand up for myself initially.

he triggered me in pressing charges of SA. should i mention it to him and threaten him i will press charges if he won’t compensate me? im not sure as well whats going to happen if i file a report. idk what to do.

edit: i’m on subclass 500 in australia. not sure if i could report this as it may result in the breach of my visa. i used to do ppm a month ago but moved to arrangements.