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I had an arrangement for the past few weeks with this SD I met through seeking. Everything was discussed when we first met and we agreed on terms and how frequently we met. We met around twice a week. Usually, he takes me out to dinner, and then we head off to a hotel nearby downtown for the rest of the night. Â
This weekend, he took me out for dinner again. He ended up drinking 3-4 cocktails. I only had one light cocktail. When he got the check, he said he's a bit too tipsy to drive and I offered that I'll drive us to the hotel. So far so good. Little did I know his car is a beast to handle. I somehow managed to reverse the car into a concrete column next to the restaurant. There's a huge scrape and a big dent all over the passenger side of his car. Looks really nasty and I felt really bad. He didn't get angry at first, but he said he's not in the mood anymore to continue to the hotel. He hold me to get myself an uber home and that we'll talk later. I think his car is very expensive. A new Porsche suv.Â
Today, he messaged me that it was actually a rental car and he can't use his insurance, as his wife will see the claim and will start asking questions why he was downtown and why he was driving a luxury rental car. He said it's my fault and I need to help pay for the damages. I said I don't have that much money and that I'm really sorry. He said it's not his problem and he can help me make money by introducing me to his friends. Is that what I think he means?
Is there a good way out of this? I'm thinking just to block him and tell him I'm no longer interested in seeing him. I'm worried he might do something, as he was picking me up from my apartment complex and knows where I live.Â
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- 5 months ago
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Iâm sorry to say this, but you are not prepared for the sugar baby lifestyle. This man shouldnât even be trying to have sex with you on the first meet if he is a true sugar, daddy. And you should not be having unprotected sex with any man until months into the relationship when you fully trust them and you guys both get screened.
Listen to yourself! You were afraid to make him angry? I can almost guarantee youâre under 21. This is why many men, target younger girls or insecure women with weak boundaries. You shouldnât be sleeping with a man you donât feel safe with. Not everyone is cut out to be a sugar baby. It sounds like you donât safely know how to vet a man. And unless you have guidance, you will continue to deal with shitty men.
Itâs clear you lack boundaries and are very naĂŻve. A combination that is a recipe for a disaster in the bowl. I agree with what others have said that you should not be in the bowl at this time. It doesnât matter how gorgeous you are if you donât have strong boundaries and donât know youâre worth. And just by reading your comments I can tell you donât.
The sad part is that you say you werenât even on the site for money. Which means that you have the luxury of waiting and being extremely selective with who you choose to start an arrangement with. But it seems like your standards are very low for whatever reason. I hope you have some good friends that knock some sense into you.
I had two friends back in my college days that were destroyed by the bowl- they had to go through therapy And had trauma from it. It is not for the weak. This is why we encourage women to wait until they are at least 21 years old (which in my opinion is still too young). Do yourself a favor and delete your account and go to therapy or read books to develop a strong boundaries and become confident. Or you can choose to stay on the site and continue to be degraded. Because these type of men will actively target you.
The way you described the sexual experience of him coming inside you is just horrible! Iâm sorry you had to go through that but Iâm also confused as to why you still donât see the red flags. He knew damn well that he was going to cum inside of you. He is a disgusting human with no shame.
Iâm surprised youâre not torn apart by the way he has treated you. You make it sound like itâs normal or âokayâ and thatâs the scary part. Stop giving these men the benefit of the doubt. They are grown and know what they are doing!
Definitely get out this lifestyle for now. Men know that many women will easily get in bed with them very easily with sweet words and empty promises. And unless you know what to look out for youâre in for a rough time. I had some bad experiences myself in my younger college days as well- and I had no one to ask for advice. Hopefully you listen to the people warning you. We arenât doing it to be mean. Weâre trying to look out for you because we know just how at risk you are. Youâre worth so much more babe. I promise you.