Greetings friends.

I, (SD)**, have been struggling finding someone. I know that I am at least partially responsible for the rut I’m in, and seeking help with changing my view and vibe I send out.

It seems that I’ve run into people who are rinsers, so I am hyper cynical. In every new m&g I feel like I’m digging for redflags. Too much drama, druggies, lazy rinsers, etc.

With friends, I try not to keep score, but in the bowl, I find myself keeping score. I try to confirm morning of, because I ‘expect’ she’s less likely to show. If she’s 14 minutes late, I’m getting back in my car, she orders enough food for leftovers 2x in a row, assume she’s a rinser.

Ok so I am creating a trust blockade that’s hard for either of us to overcome. How do I change my approach so dramatically that I am either in a less rinser segment of the market, or I’m putting out vibes that I’m worth more in ppm, than rinse mode, or something else? How do I get to an environment that is less mutually transactional and more mutually beneficial?

I**. What parts of this make me more or less appealing?

54, bald, 5-7, 180, white collar.
Grad degree, engineering, manager Genuinely interested in people Genuinely empathetic I understand when you get sick, I assuming I trust you. I would also take a day off to help you if I had the necessary experience or expertise. Afternoon availability only Don’t drink/drug Moderate ED, but want to make sure you enjoy yourself in bed Need discretion Average/ middle ppm.