I was having a very retrospective conversation with one of my regulars last night and he was telling me how paying for sex is so unthinkable for him and i was telling him how my job completely changed my interactions with men, meaning i only exchange my time for some compensation, whether it’s monetary, gifts, or traveling, and that is the only way i currently will interact w men or go out with them. They have to provide something for me if Im gonna make the time. He told me this was a very harmful way of thinking because i won’t really know if i like them for them or bc they’re doing things for me.

I’d like to clarify at this point of my life i am not looking for a relationship nor allowing myself to have feelings for the men in my life, Im strictly focused on the bag and my long term financial goals. I have loved in the past and obvi dont expect those men to literally be paying me or constantly flooding me in material things bc a real relationship is mutual and has more more things that you are mutually exchanging that aren’t necessarily materialistic.

This made me think if im wrong for doing that or wrong for not really connecting with men currently unless they are giving me something. I’d like to know if any other dancer has felt this way or also expects men in their lives to give them something in exchange for your time (like i said not currently looking for a real relationship)

I’m well are one day one I’m ready i will open up in an emotional way and i want it to be real and i do believe in love and want something genuine, but at the same time the right man for me will be doing things without me asking him to or me expecting him to, it will be intrinsic for him, but until that day if i meet anyone at the club and they are interested in me making time for them then they need to be giving me something for me to even consider it