😒🙄

I am not a bitch; I’m actually pretty nice. I mean of course I will speak when spoken to.

Or, for example, if I just got to work and I notice that my friend is there, it is very likely that I am happy to see her, so of course I will talk to her, catch up with her, and things like that. It comes natural…

I might give somebody a compliment, or ask them how their night is going.

But IN GENERAL — when I arrive to work, I am trying to go find a spot to put my bag down in the dressing room. Sometimes it’s very full and cluttered and it can be hard to find space to put your stuff. I really want to be left the fuck alone. Especially if I was running late to work (which is usually the case, I can’t get my life together). I know—something I need to work on. I am still probably trying to decompress from the stress & anxiety of getting ready for work and driving there. Now I just want to change and possibly touch up my makeup & perfume, and go clock in ON TIME, and then go out on the floor and scope out the room, and try to start making my rounds…

It is so annoying when some chick — especially some girl you don’t even know like that — starts yapping in your ear, because, to me, it’s like. These are the last few minutes I have to myself, to do whatever I need to do to mentally prepare, to get my night started…

I’m introverted. I have a lot of internal things going on, at all times. I am not always feeling super secure in myself, in my outfit, in my body… etc…

Depending on what’s going on in my personal life/at home, also…

That could also be affecting me, among other things…

But really, what I am talking about here is mostly an issue of time-management. And also, personal boundaries.

I wish people would respect that, when I literally just got to work, when I am in the mirror, when I’m changing, etc., I really don’t want to be bothered. It stresses me out to be pulled into a lot of side conversations, or to have girls I don’t even know try to come over and talk to me when I am literally standing there with my pussy out.

It’s also like, I just want to listen to some music while I get ready to go out on the floor, hydrate, set some money goals in my notes, double-check my look to make sure everything is right down to the details, take some deep breaths… and try to clock in, ON TIME. Not to mention, I am putting together looks: outfit, hairstyle, jewelry and accessories, shoes, money bag… When people talk to me about random things, without my consent, it can be kind of annoying & irritating… And at times distracting, for someone like me. Multitasking is not my strong suit…

Sometimes I will even go tip the DJ, or put in some song requests.

I kind of don’t like being bombarded when I first get to work, it throws me off… too many distractions & time-wasters. I also don’t care for a lot of drama, and negativity…

And then even once out on the floor: It does take me a little time to loosen up & get “comfortable.” I try to observe what is going on in the room, and get a general feel for that night. (Energy, people, music, money, vibes…) It is so unpredictable, also. Like, sometimes I find I am waiting HOURS to go up on stage. And then other times, it seems like I am being called to go on stage immediately as soon as I clocked in and sat down out on the floor. But— it also depends on what kind of mood I am in, that day (my “talkative levels,” I guess).

Don’t get me wrong, it can be very useful to befriend the dancers. Sometimes you can carpool to work, or go out to brunch/go shopping… Do doubles… Or they can introduce you to their “big-spender” type clients… being invited into the section… and things like that. So it’s good to have friends and alliances in the club, and it’s good to be “cool” with the general population…

But I am still my own person, & I have my own needs.

I don’t always like having people all in my face when I just got to work, and I haven’t even had a chance to put down my bags yet. You know?

I like to be in my own personal bubble. Especially if I don’t know you like that. I have a lot of sensitivities…

Does anyone else feel this way or experience this sometimes?