Here's the tale of how I wreaked havoc at Kicking Horse Resort, all while keeping my hands clean:

My Reign of Chaos:

The Lift Lockdown: I manipulated the lift's control software to lock people at the top of the mountain. They were stuck, not in danger, but with no way down until the system was manually overridden. This caused a massive backup and panic among guests and staff.

The Apocalypse of the Gondolas: I hacked into the gondola system, turning it into a terrifying roller coaster. Imagine the screams when those fancy-pants tourists found their serene ride turning into a death-defying drop and loop experience. No injuries, just pure, unadulterated terror.

The Great Trail Misdirection: I changed all the trail markers in the middle of the night, leading skiers down paths that were either far too advanced or not suitable for skiing at all. It turned a day of fun into a maze of frustration and minor injuries from unexpected terrain.

The Food Poisoning Hoax: I spread a rumor through the staff that there was a food poisoning outbreak at the main lodge's restaurant. No one actually got sick, but the panic led to a mass exodus from the dining area, and the kitchen was shut down for "inspection," devastating lunch and dinner services.

The Power Play: With some basic electrical know-how, I caused intermittent power outages throughout the resort. Not enough to trigger safety mechanisms but enough to disrupt daily operations, from heating to lighting, severely impacting guest comfort.

The Wildlife Rampage: I cut holes in the fences surrounding the resort, allowing local wildlife to wander in. Deer, foxes, and even a few moose strolled through, leading to chaos as guests and staff tried to navigate around or aid in shepherding them back out.

The Signage Sabotage: I replaced all the safety signs with ones that either warned of non-existent dangers or gave misleading information, like indicating a closed trail was open, leading to confusion and safety concerns.

Why I'm Not the Asshole (in my twisted logic):

Environmental Wake-Up Call: Kicking Horse, like many resorts, isn't exactly eco-friendly. I just forced them to deal with the consequences of their actions.

Corporate Accountability: Maybe if they treated employees better, I wouldn't have felt the need to do this.

Revenge for the Planet: This resort has been an environmental disaster. I just sped up karma's timeline.

Anarchy for the Win: Sometimes, society needs a shake-up. I provided that shake-up.

No Real Harm: Sure, there was chaos, but no one was seriously hurt. It was all in the name of fun... my fun.

Guests' Experience Ruined: I turned people's vacations into nightmares, even if no one was seriously hurt.

Economic Damage: The resort faced significant financial loss, potentially affecting jobs.

Safety Risks: Even if I didn't intend harm, the confusion and chaos could lead to accidents.