My girlfriend (22) has always been a soft hearted woman. The type of woman that is too 'cutesy', as people would say. But I love her for it. Not because she's gentle but because she's her. She flinches every time someone raises their voice, tries not to gather so much attention but is so funny and playful to people she's comfortable with. I try to be there for her, to be a balance of defending her and at the same time, helping her open up to people. She grew up in an abusive household and has been taking care of her younger siblings at a very young age and that resulted in her being robbed of her childhood. So, in return, she likes to collect as many plushies as she can. Her room is painted in pastel colors, decorated in everything cute, and in her bed, you'll see her collection of stuffed toys. It's a way for her to heal her inner child, and that's just her aesthetic so I indulge it. Whenever I can, I try to add to her collection just to see the smile on her face every time I visit. I also tried to learn how to crochet to make her little dolls so she doesn't have to spend money.

My girlfriend is close to my family and vice versa. She's invited to every family events, and my parents absolutely adore her. I have an older sister who has five year old twin daughters. We have a pretty decent relationship at first but she became indifferent to us the moment she met her now husband.

My girlfriend invited her to her birthday alongside my mother. It was a small party, consisting only of her siblings and my sister, her daughters, my mother and me. Everything was going well, until the party ended and everyone left. I stayed behind so I can help her clean up and also spend some time together with her, when I noticed her crying in her bed. Half of her plushies are gone and when I asked what happened, she hesitated at first but told me that my nieces saw her plushies and basically wailed to my sister about wanting them. My sister basically gave them to her daughters without asking her first and my girlfriend, unable to refuse because my nieces basically hogged them already, simply remained silent. And as I said, she's a very demure woman who grew up in a not-so-kind household so she doesn't like arguments or any conflicts so she just zipped her lips. She assured me that it's fine because she still has some left, but she does cry about it because some of the plushies they took are given by her deceased grandmother and little sister and therefore holds sentimental value to her.

I comforted her and we spent the night watching Harry Potter. It's her special day and I didn't want it ruined for her. The next day, I called my sister and asked her about what happened. She told me that my girlfriend's an adult now and she shouldn't be having that many toys with her. I explained that some of those plushies holds value to her and she shouldn't be taking something without permission in the first place. She said that it's fine because they're for my nieces but I said that my nieces should learn not to casually take things as they please. She got angry and called me a ped0phile because I have a girlfriend who seems so childish and immature and resembles a child (?? My girlfriend is 5'1 but petite women exists and we're the same age. Apparently, everyone below 5'2 is a child now???). The instance she raised her voice at me, I started yelling back. She accused me of being a pdophle so I accused her of being so broke that she can't even afford to buy her daughter toys. And I also said that her husband is a pdopile then because they have a six year age gap. She hung up on me and needless to say, the fight between us reached our parent's ears and now I'm being forced to apologize to her because I hurt her pride and because they said my girlfriend basically agreed to let them have the plushies anyways. I asked what my girlfriend said and they said (based on my sister) that my girlfriend didn't say anything when my nieces were taking the plushies. But silence doesn't equate to a yes. My sister's husband also made fun of me because I'm arguing over toys, and called my girlfriend selfish and weak because she didn't want to give her plushies to my nieces and also didn't have the spine to say no when they took it.

Maybe I'm a jerk because of the things I said to my sister, but I can't take away the image of my girlfriend crying on her birthday. That one day dedicated for her. Her special day. My girlfriend heard of what happened and thanked me for defending her, but then told me to make up with my sister because it's not worth fighting over but she still looks so glum and sad over everything. Her coping mechanism has been made fun of, and she's been compared to a child. They may just be plushies in my sister's eyes but they're part of my girlfriend's healing process, and it feels like they took that away. Maybe I am overreacting about everything. I'll calm myself first, then maybe I'll be able to think rationally.