This might not work for all but with how fast life is I kinda wanted to jump in.

BACKGROUND: I do have a lot of experience going sober for long spurts of time but I usually end it with using the “fuck it” attitude and just put up with the hangovers and anxiety just so I feel “okay” going out with friends to “have a good time” at the club or whatever bbq, venue, etc. the kind of drinker I am is big time binge and I would get trapped into a cycle sometimes of drinking 6-8 tall cans of beer every night in a matter of 5 hours or less almost daily followed by a week off every other week. Yikes.

BUT now in my 30s… hangovers and anxiety are ACTUALLY debilitating. Like I would probably need drugs to overcome them and… I don’t like doing drugs. When I was younger I could power through them but now I’m just a sad sack that is very inefficient at work on Tuesdays and sometimes Wednesdays (I live the 4 day work week).

LET’S get to June of this year: the way I operate is every other summer I do “sober summer” to explore new hobbies or to elevate my career. And in general it worked for me and this year is a sober summer year but it would usually end up me being alone to cope with the change and too afraid to do anything in fear I’d mess it up. I said FUCK that I can’t be a loner going sober anymore and need to show my friends that sobriety from alcohol (I’m quite fine with weed and mushroom on occasion in low dosages) is an extremely powerful thing. I.e. you don’t need alcohol to have that fun!

I went to 3 raves this weekend on each night stone cold sober dancing my heart out. All powered by water and one of the nights a Red Bull. I felt ON FIRE. I had energy, I was coherent, I didn’t have to go to the bathroom every 20 minutes, I made sure my partner got home was safe and I was okay leaving a “little early” it was (3am lol).

The 2nd one I went on my own. Before the pandemic I was very confident on going on my own but that may have been the booze to ease my nervousness. Anyway, sober again, no Red Bull this time because fuck anxiety that caffeine can induce. The first hour I was like “wow fuck this I feel so alone and weird” but then a moment clicked: there are others on their own, we are all weird as fuck for liking dubstep and we are all here to be rocked by the bass because we can’t do that at home. A GRAND SUCCESS. I am as weird as everyone else, I don’t need booze to overcome that feeling! Embrace it! FULL DANCE MODE ACTIVATED. Holy shit I went to a rave alone, danced and had the best time and I REMEMBER it and didn’t piss myself or make myself look like an ass! Woohoo! I treated myself with popeyes fried chicken on my way home.

Sunday night is quick: rode my cargo bike to Cherry beach in Toronto, had a massive bbq with 6 other friends and then we checked out the Promise rave. Didn’t even think of booze even when at the grocery store. The only thing I regret is over paying for a pack of subpar La Croix Beach Plum flavored sparking water. Seriously. Underwhelming flavor.

So that was my take away. Whatever dance party you go to. You’re just as fucking weird and also awesome as everyone around you. It might take a second to click, at least for me, but booze doesn’t need to be your crutch. I was able to party all weekend only powered by water, delicious bbq and being so stoked on life.

So that’s it. My take away was that I really do not need alcohol to power my weekend. In fact that was my downfall. It would leave me a mess, make for horrible weekends most of the time and destroy my memory. I had the energy to do EVERYTHING and anything I wanted this weekend and it has now hopefully set the tone for the rest of my life. Fuck alcohol, love water. And reminder: you’re just as fucking weird as everyone else in the room.

This rant is not to be used as guidance or therapy. This is my experience alone but if it can give a fellow raver a different perspective and that it’s doable… well that’s just great :)

Edit: for the lurkers, ya 12 days I commented somewhere that I bought last minute beer: cold turkey quitting is very un enjoyable for me and I tapered off the first week of June to begin my “sober summer” and would have been my last 4 beers. Again doesn’t work for everyone, please do not use my post for your journey. Thanks for reading!