The last few years, I really struggled with alcohol. I was avg about 8 drinks a day, usually 2 beers at lunch and 6 whiskey sours in the evening. I started taking abilify for my depression and the dose I was on made it impossible to drink without getting horrible spins, so I quit basically cold turkey in August. I lowered my dose to combat some side effects, and was able to start drinking again, but for the most part did a good job of not over indulging and sometimes going a week or two without a single drink, and only having one or two at a time.

The last few months however, I've been drinking more often and more at a time. I'm starting to suspect it's after my general mood, as some of my negative behaviors are returning, like general negativity, extreme self depreciation, and self harm/violent outbursts like to punching a wall or slamming a desk, throwing things when upset.

It's really a bad situation, and Im planning on quitting drinking for a least month to see if it helps, but I really don't want to, which I think is a bad sign.

I use alcohol to get through social situations a lot, and this is a social time of year