As it may be obvious from my profile, I am currently in my eighth week of rehab. I am meant to be leaving next weekend, but there have been a number of things that have made me think that I need to leave this weekend. I have completed the program, but I extended my stay so I could spend a few more weeks without temptation.

I still crave my drink of choice, wine. I’m on medication and have some tools to help avoid these now, but I have begun attending online AA meetings, and something I am coming to realise is that while I know I need to be sober, for my family and my health, I don’t know if I am ready to be sober. I keep hearing stories of people telling me how something happened that made them not want to drink anymore, and I didn’t have that. My rock bottom was a minor incident, that exposed my drinking to my children. I absolutely don’t want a rock bottom that is worse than that, but I almost feel like I need one to change me from needing to quit to wanting to quit.

I would appreciate any advice. I do intend to be sober, I’m in my third AA meeting of the day, but I’m worried that I will relapse at the earliest incident.