Since making this decision, I've actually found as the days have gone by things have been getting easier.

For a TL:Dr on my situation, basicly in a marriage with emotional and physical neglect, depression, anxiety, 2020-2022 being the worst years of my life involving a pet death, parent death and terrible employers

Fast forward to today, I'm fulfilling a childhood dream, I'm in a good employer, like really good but I still drank, the slightest thing would make me want to go to the bottle. Breaking point happened and me and the wife had a break which involved me staying at a hotel for a few night, yes, I drank there just to beat the boredom and lonliness. Now back home, I've decided to make the decision to cut the drink. I did this for me and no one else, no "I'll stay off for a week" or " I'll have some on x date". Sure I've had low and no but still I think this is a huge accomplishment considering I was secret drinking, smuggling empty cans out of.my house and drinking at least 4 pint cans a day.

Now I'm back on my antidepressants and hitting the gym properly this time , I'm feeling in a good place. I've had some tests this week though, tough days at work, dog misbehaving, in laws staying, going out but I've kept to my mantra of IWNDWYT!

benefits I've seen of not drinking now, saving money being a big one, not just flushing it down the crapper, weight loss, in 3 days I lost a kilo! I'll weight myself tomorrow with an updated figure in the edit. General better wellbeing and just more intense with things!

So stopdrinking, keep on being awesome and we can all get through this togeather! IWNDWYT!!!