My SD (9) lives 600km away with her mom, stepdad and step brothers. Usually she has a 2-week visit over Spring Break and Easter or Christmas (alternating years) and a month in the summer time. Wish it was more but it is what it is. Due to covid, her visit this spring has been delayed.

The last few weeks I've been missing her lots. I'm off of work and she's out of school, no childcare issues at all. I feel like we should try to be there for her. And all professional advice leans towards keeping with parenting plans unless there are extenuating circumstances (like a child having a weakened immune system or the parent is at high risk of exposure). I just think we should go get her. It's been nearly a year since we last saw her.

My s/o is slightly more yielding to the idea, although he has a Disneyland Dad complex a bit. He's said he wants her time here to be fun. Which I think is dumb because she's probably just as bored at her mom's house. And honestly I just think that we will still find ways to have fun and she will feel loved. She and my son are super good friends and they play and hang out all the time when she is here. It will be fine. I think I can get him to bend on this.

My IL's are a different story. We'd need to borrow their vehicle to pick her up since ours isn't Canadian-Rockies-in-Spring worthy. When I brought it up last week with my MIL she totally turned on me. I know she was 'trying to be nice' but she basically accused me of being irresponsible with SD's health by wanting to pick her up. Told me I needed to 'be an adult'. I haven't responded, but I've been thinking of revisiting that uncomfortable topic with her, with better preparedness. MIL is pretty damn stubborn, and I have had to politely tell her I 'agree to disagree' with her on many occasions since I don't usually care to have an argument. But this, idk... it's just too important to just defer to her y'know? And dammit, I am generally extremely polite and reasonable. To a fault even. If she goes off the deep end hurling insults that's a her problem.

How would you confront this issue as a step parent? Should I go to MIL with evidence? Back off entirely? Is it even my place to go to bat with this issue? Any advice would be extremely appreciated.