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My partner (48m) thinks I (34f) favor our bio daughter (5f) over my stepkids (8f & 12f) because I get excited when she likes things I like, primarily books.
My step kids and I get along great (just to be clear) but I (was, as I don't have as much time as I used to/would like) an avid reader, neither my partner nor my stepkids like to read - which is fine they don't.
I only push them to read for school/homework, once thats done, no forced reading. I do however let them stay up past their bedtime if they arent tired and read, but i dont make them. it's just an option, and is something my parents would do for me when I was growing up. Sometimes the 8f will listen to audio books as she has sleeping issues.
I used to try when they were little getting books on things they like (Frozen/disney princesses, their favorite animal, stuff like that). I also spend plenty of time expressing an interest in things they actually like (we are talking movies, nature walks, museums, I research their favorite animals and make art for their walls, we color and talk, "spa days" and I taught them both to play chess). I have done most, but not all of these things with my bio daughter (some aren't age appropreate or she has no interest. I also give each of my step daughters one on one days each summer doing whatever they want to do (usually includes their favorite lunch and 2 to 3 activities they enjoy.
My bio daughter loves books and I get excited when she asks to cuddle up and have me read to her, I get excited when she likes books I used to like. it's something I've always looked forward to when I thought about motherhood. I have always been disapointed I haven't sparked a love in books for my step kids, but I can't force them to like books. I do read less with her when they are around because we are usually doing something together we all like, but he gets annoyed When a big smile comes across my face when she asks for another story.
Am I inappropreatly showing favortism to my bio daughter? I feel like I spend as equal time as is possible.
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- 1 year ago
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