First of all, I apologize if the topic seems unpleasant or out of context; but it is something that has always been within me. Any response is welcome.

The question I want to raise is what spiritual or profound interpretation can be drawn from this "philia." To summarize, I have always felt a fatal attraction to everything dark: Gothic horror, Edgar Allan Poe, Burton, Lovecraft... haunted castles, vampires, witches, demons; all of this intertwined with an equally strong attraction to the theme of BDSM. Is this an infestation? A spiritual path to explore? Something to combat and transcend? It's difficult to feel as a good human when you have this stuff inside you.

Thank you for reading me