so i’m working on getting sober, and i’ve been sober off of xtc and stuff for over a month now. i’m trying to stretch out the periods of where i’m sober one by one, at first it’s been 2-3 weeks and now i’ve gotten an entire month and i planned on taking smth again this friday, so i bought pills today. i got home after school and wanted to hide them in my usual hiding place until my parents went to sleep tmrw, but turns out i had an old baggy in there with maybe 10mg left of speed. and seeing that just made me so triggered, my heart was beating so fast and i was so dizzy and even moving my fingers was hurting so bad that i ended up snorting it lol, no but now im in bed cause i’m cold asf and i mean im feeling amazing but also the guilt is eating me alive. it was supposed to be tomorrow. and knowing me i will take those pills tomorrow anyway.

i just need help man i needed to vent lol sorry