When I dom someone, it's just such a natural extension of what I usually do to everyone around me

Just walking around, I want to take care of the people around me. I want them to feel safe, valued, and to enjoy themselves. Whenever I have company over, I make sure to have a home cooked meal for them. Italian Casserole, Tikka massala, chicken bacon shrimp alfredo, etc

I can't help everyone directly, and you know what I do instead? Tell them a stupid joke to take their mind off their problems. Cashier looks like they're having a bad day? Time for an awful pun they'll share with someone else

So when I get a woman into bed, they get ALL of it. I want them to feel safe and heard and above all. Then I want them to have such a good time they just forget the weight of the world for however long I've got them in my arms

Not everyone likes that amount of gentleness and care though, so I still put some spin on it. Edging them, making them play little mind games that pit their desires against their self control, etc

But that's the spoonful of sugar to make the medicine go down. I'm a big, burly, intense man, and I want to use all that to make someone feel good, safe, and cared for. I want to give someone the space and time to just truly relax, to forget their issues, and accept being cared for