So, I posted (somewhat) about this in a different sub a while ago but I feel like I need more clarity?

Short backstory basically…I (38f) started this job literally around the same time with this guy (33m) and we became friends (I thought). We were texting, talking at work, became FB friends, took breaks together. Everything seemed fine until it didn’t. So then, he stopped returning texts. I thought it was weird and random and unlike him so I asked via text if he was okay…no response. I would see him at work and then he would apologize right away for seeing my text and not responding, and act the same in person as he has been for months. I asked if he was okay with me texting him because it started becoming a regular thing where he would ignore texts then (unprompted) apologize in person for seeing the text snd not responding.

Now for context, I’m married and I just wanted a platonic male work friend. It wasn’t some hidden relationship—my husband knew he existed and were friends and didn’t care. This guy (I’ll call him Sam), was single at the time and told me he started seeing a girl and he was taking it slow and I was happy for him.

So it just got gradually weird to the point that I noticed him avoiding me during breaks and getting super quiet and talking to this guy (that I happened to really really not get along with but that’s another story), instead. So, last time I talked to him I told him that I would stop texting him because he doesn’t text back and I don’t want to feel like a crazy stalker (jokingly, to lighten the mood). He assured me it was always fine to text him and he’s just (all of a sudden) bad at texting back. So, I told him how I had what I thought was a good friend a while back, for almost a decade. And then out of nowhere she released a storm of fury and told me all the things that bothered her about me and said all of these horrible things out of nowhere. I told him that after that I tend to ask anyone I’m friends with if everything’s okay, especially if they’re acting out of the ordinary. He seemingly agreed and acted like that’s the last thing that would happen but then…(drum roll) he changed his schedule so we work opposite from each other (we used to work the same days), and the last mandatory meeting we had was awkward asf because he acted like nothing was wrong when saying hi but purposely sat at a different table and avoided looking at me (??). So, I just unfriended him on Facebook because why be friends with someone that obviously is avoiding you this much. I’m honestly surprised he even added me as a friend and didn’t unfriend me a while ago given his behavior. Other Redditors in my last post about him said he all of a sudden feels uncomfortable being friends with a married woman? But I don’t 1) why he would suddenly, 2) why he would pretend like things are okay in person, 3) why he’s being such a chickenshit and not just telling me to my face. I get ghosting is a thing but with friends?? And why isn’t he consistent? I just…don’t get it lol. Honestly, this is so frustrating and disappointing because I seriously thought we were friends. Not sure if anyone else can clarify this hot mess? Honestly, I have a hard enough time making and keeping friends working night shift and juggling a family and kid drop offs during the day so this…sucks.

Also, I have ADHD so social cues are sometimes an issue so….am I missing something here??

Edit to clarify: I’m the only female working with a crew of guys. And, if someone doesn’t want to be friends with me that’s perfectly fine. My post is just the confusion with the behavior leading up to it and the ghosting. If I was doing something wrong or did anything to make anyone uncomfortable, I just like to know so I can prevent the behavior in the future.

Last edit: THANK YOU to everyone that posted with insight on this. It really was helpful. To those losing sight of the reason I posted this and obsessing over me having an opposite sex friend…please stop. This was never an issue with my husband and nothing sinister or secretive was happening. This may have become an issue for the friend, which I acknowledge (but I’ll never know of) but never an issue between my husband and I.