27 now. I am 6ft, but I have a 4.7 (pushing it) girth 4.3. It's almost never that thick during and has also softened due to anxieties and I've had a fair share of poor sex because of it. I have to buy specifically tight condoms to fit, cos normal ones slip off (some people say their condoms BREAK. LOL I WISH!). I've been very very insecure about this. I think I like almost every aspect of myself outside of that.

I'm a decent looking guy, I'd say. I am somewhat humorous, I am interested in a lot of topics, fairly intelligent, I'd say very emotionally mature (probably forced to because I needed to understand women better). I have a decent job, so I look after myself. I read the book 'She comes first' once and became good at eating pussy. You could argue I'm the stereotype of a dude with a small wang - I make up for it in other aspects. I just feel like going hard is not that satisfying.

My friends have talked about how their girlfriends are obsessed with their dicks, but NO girl has ever given me the wide eyes on seeing mine.

I have been with around 30 girls, believe it or not, because I'm very good at talking to them. I've been told I'm charming. The only problem with this is that it makes a girl expect I've probably got something worth sharing. So I feel a little manipulative because of that (more later).

Out of the 30 girls... I think 6 or 7 of them were one night stands and these were the worst. My friends would tell me how 'empty' one night stands were for them, but AT LEAST they were an 'ego' boost (probably because they had no penis problems so it felt nice that a girl wanted them).

For me, not only were they were empty, but also the opposite of a boost, as I'd keep thinking about how unsatisfied a girl was. I'd read her body language extra carefully and see how gutted they looked. This may not even be true, I just perceived it that way as I was projecting my thoughts. In fact, once, a girl even texted me a week later asking what I was up to, and I responded with 'no one else texted back??' because I just thought I'd absolutely be last resort. Imagine what a dick move that was? She responded with 'jeez I was nearby but ok forget it' -- Like just cos I hated my own dick, I thought she would. What if she was actually into it and I just made her feel insecure because I didn't text her back? I was a dick to her, while if my perspective on that situation was - ''she wants my D! woohoo'' I could've enjoyed it.

Another was a relationship. Lebanese girl. Her ex was Lebanese. If you've googled it (and you have) - they're the most hung - Huge guy, she told me he had a huge dick. She was with him for 3 years. I was so insecure, because I was worried I wouldn't be good enough. It would bother her because she'd have to tell me to stop worrying all the time! The moment she would suggest some 'fun' moves in the bed, I panicked at the idea it would be terrible for her. We broke up for other reasons (but come to think of it, it was largely due to me thinking I wasn't good enough) and she is now in a relationship with a girl, LOL. I either turned her away from men for good or she genuinely didn't give a shit. I found my unicorn and let it go, haha.

Only in retrospect do I realize my insecurities are more unattractive than my dick. I can't state that enough.

You might disagree. You might think you'd be fine with an insecure girl who's got body issues - but that's only because you are insecure. I can say that because over some time, I started to like myself. Yeah I wish it was bigger. It looks lame. But I HAVE to accept it - and slowly as I did, I started to realize how frustrating it was be to be around an insecure girl. (one girl was super needy, always wanting to kiss and was a bit clingy).

And here's the thing - I could be wrong but I think most girls are actually quite comfortable with their body. They know if a guy likes them, they've probably already eyed them up. So once they're naked, it's not like there's that much more to show.

Whereas guys can fake confidence but the moment the dicks out, their true nature shines.

So both confident guys and girls want each other. And USUALLY, confident guys have big dicks. It would be quite the surprise for a girl to find a confident small guy. And if they don't like him 'cause he's small, they should be allowed. Just like we don't like some girls because they're ugly (I'll get to that later)

Porn definitely made it worse. I once tried 30 days off and had sex with a girl and I was strangely way more into it. It was like I didn't even give a shit about my size cos I hadn't seen a woman's body in 30 days. I felt more connected to her and didn't even have a moment to get in my head because the blood was rushing elsewhere, haha. I'd say try it.

Another porn related thing - I always thought great sex would be like in porn, where the girl is screaming about how great it is. Girls were never that with me. Maybe a little moan here and there. One girl once made a lot of porn sounds and I just believed she was lying to me. She probably was. It put me off at the time, I won't lie. I thought she was trying to fake it to sound like porn, while my lackluster penis wasn't matching up. It actually turned me off! And now, looking back, my perspective is so different - I think -- Who cares? It was adorable of her to try to turn me on with those sounds. One 9/10 girl told me I gave her the best head she'd ever gotten, but she said nothing about penetration. She also made little sound. I took the compliment, and realized noise and satisfaction aren't necessarily correlated. Sometimes the noises just help loosen things up. Maybe allow yourself to make noises to get into it more.

A Fleshlight made it better - I got so used to using my own hand because I was anxious of sex, that I found sex like a slip n' slide. It was all slippery and wet and I couldn't feel anything - which exasperated the fact my dick was small -- Getting used to the Fleshlight meant I actually LEARNT to cum via penetration instead of my own death grip. I actually started to find a different sensation in the wetness, rather than the pulling back and forth. I don't know if anyone else has this problem but it definitely helped me enjoy penetration more.

Here's some more thoughts in no particular order:

I'm superficial. I love hot girls. I don't want to settle with an ugly girl just because I have a small penis. I've been really hurt by a girl that was super attractive, she really liked me, but after we fucked, she said 'we aren't sexually compatible'. I was hurt but tried to stay composed. My response was a little more like 'oh right, but like is that something that you think would change? Like what...?' and I realized how uncomfortable it must've made her feel. She liked my personality, but required a big dick, while I liked her personality but required she be attractive. I was the only one that got what I wanted for that night, and now she was left having to feel guilty about continuing on.

When you look at it that way, you can become a little bit more compassionate on both others and yourself.

I meet an ugly woman, I am allowed to just NOT be interested from the beginning, and it saves her the embarrassment of knowing why. Whereas the embarrassment for us comes from how interested they were before sex, and how interested they became after sex. It's too obvious.

In some strange way, it feels kind've manipulative to not tell a girl how small I am, in case I don't get pussy. So I don't tell her for my own selfish gain. If I do tell a girl about it, beforehand, I risk the chance of not getting laid at ALL. Honesty with potentially no sex? Or say nothing and potential humiliation? Hard question.

One thing that has really helped me over time is letting go of the need of a girlfriend. It's easier said than done, but I realized love is just a transaction. It's never unconditional. You want something she's offering (a hot body/funny/emotionally mature?) and she wants something you're offering (big dick/money/emotionally mature/funny/god knows/all of the above). -- so I just find my hand is a much easier option.

The freedom for me came when I realized this, because it made me stop putting sex on a pedestal. I mean, they say relationships are supposed to be honest with great communication right? So what if I just went into relationships and said to them from the get-go ''I hope you don't have big preferences because I have been blessed with Indian genetics LOL'. That gives them a get-out-of-free-card, and also removes the anxiety of that big reveal. It's actually more compassionate toward them, too. It's allowing them to be open with you. If they say 'yeah that's a thing for me, I'm not a fan.' and you say 'take care and I wish you the best!' You have to practice compassion and not relish in your bitterness.

The best relationship I had was with a girl that said to me 'wow you're lanky and your dick is way smaller than I expected. ehhh, well, that's fine. ' I was shocked by her honesty. I laughed and said 'and your boobs are tiny but at least they're sensitive, fine by me!' -- there was something so refreshing about being able to be bluntly honest and still showing each other that we wanted each other for WHATEVER reason.

Perhaps the most honest transaction to fuck a hot girl would be to just go pay for it.

Or, go find a hot girl that's into small dicks. BUT YOU MUST FACE REJECTION. This is the thing I find so difficult to wrap my head around - there are guys that have basically committed to a life of celibacy JUST TO AVOID REJECTION. I'm all for celibacy if it's rational and you truly believe in spirituality and whatnot - but to drop into that life simply because rejection is too painful, is, in my opinion, a weak mindset. I'm sorry if that is offensive. You definitely have a worse pool of options though.

You already KNOW girls are not going to be with you for your small dick, so... go face it. You better make sure you got something else to offer though. It's hard right? Almost doesn't seem fair. Well, consider this - you wouldn't fuck an ugly girl so if you want to have high standards, you better raise your own.

The main reason I get bogged down by my size is because I KNOW I have to try in other departments to maintain a girl. It's very selfish. It has made me bitter before, as I hated the idea that my dick wouldn't make a girl worship me, until my perception changed -- if you were a bit more compassionate toward others and realized you are JUST as judgmental, you'd understand a girl is totally allowed to be grossed out by your small dick, just as you're allowed to be grossed out by ugly girls.

I'd say having a small dick has allowed me to face the truths of life. It's unveiled the magic behind relationships to see them for what they really are. And while that's fuel for bitterness, it's weirdly empowering too. It means I won't jump into a relationship with false hopes that it's going to work just because sex is good - I jump in fully aware that I'd better offer something good and she better, too. It makes me see relationships more honestly, and I'm more truthful because of it.

I think it's made me a better person in a strange way. I'm more straight-forward, I've learnt to face rejection, I bounce back quicker, and have become emotionally mature through it - It's knocked my ego down enough to a healthy 'we are all in this world together' mentality, and I hurt less girls because of it (mentally and definitely physically hahah), as I don't believe I'm to be worshipped.

I'd still trade it for a bigger one though, hahahaha. I just don't think I would've found as much peace in life.