I've seen a lot of strange things while traveling the multiverse. Plenty of advanced science, and a ton of cool magic, but never anything truly divine.

That is until this morning. When I woke up, there was someone in my bed. She was beautiful. Long, blonde hair down to her hips, silver like thunderclouds, curves that would put an hourglass to shame, wonderfully tanned skin, silky white robe, and an impressive build. At least 8 or 9 feet tall. More importantly, she was laying under my covers, directly on top of me. When I opened my eyes, there she was with a warm smile. When I asked her what she was doing in my house, she told me that she was actually Aphrodite, the goddess of lust. That confused me, as I always thought Aphrodite supported love and marriage; but as it turns out, that's Hera's job. Aphrodite is the goddess of sexual love. Passion, attraction, the butterflies in your stomach, the fireworks of a first kiss, the one night stands. That's her domain.

Anyway, she came to visit me because she was feeling a bit lonely up on Olympus. Sometimes she likes to come down and find a guy who can keep her company. Naturally, I was down for that, but then she started feeling me up. Her hands started exploring down south. She told me she planned on visiting there at least thrice while we were together. Per day. And... that's kinda where things fell through.

See, despite having a number of partners in the past, I'm actually still a virgin. I'll do a lot of kinky stuff, like get tied up, kiss the booty, lick some feet, all that stuff; but actual sex, I was saving for marriage. I know that makes me a little old fashioned. I don't judge anyone who does it regularly outside of that. I just wanted mine to be special. You know? So I tried to explain that to her. I told her I was flattered that she wanted me, but I'd have to pass on that part. She looked at me a little funny, and then started giggling. "Playing hard to get." She said. Then she started telling me about the blessings that would come afterwards. Laying with a goddess would apparently boost my fertility, making me better equipped for later sessions with the partner of my choice. Plus, for making her feel good, I'd have some things start to go right for me for a while. She didn't say exactly what, but she hinted very strongly at financial gain. Plus, she said, she would be the greatest I had ever felt.

I suddenly thought of what those waitresses go through when rich guys offer them money and cars for "a little action". I had always been disgusted by those types, but now that I was faced with someone who couldn't take no for an answer, I felt a great deal of respect for the ones who have it every week. I had to stick to my guns and politely decline. Aphrodite seemed very confused by that. She asked me why I really said no. I told her that I told her why. I wanted to wait to actually get in bed until I found my life partner. I tried to get up out of my bed at this point, but I couldn't move her. She kept me pinned down. She asked me if it was something she said, or if I'd reconsider if she changed her physical form a bit. I told her again that that wasn't it. She was beautiful just the way she was, but I wasn't interested in anyone at the time. She then asked me if I was by any chance, hiding in the closet, or if I just didn't like sex in general. I told her I am somewhere on the ace spectrum, but I do want to have it someday. Just not at that exact moment, and not with her specifically. That... was apparently the wrong thing to say. She put a hand down on my chest and declared. "If my form is not pleasing enough for you now... May you take a form that will never please a partner again!"

Then there was this flash of light, and she was gone. I was worried for a moment that she had turned me into some kind of monster or something, but it turns out that she just meant I'd be shrunken. I'm typing this from my spare emergency tiny phone.

... Yeah, I don't think she knew that much about me going in. I've spent a lot of time prepping my house for size shenanigans. I've got pulley systems to scale any couch, chair, or table in the place. I've had to make room for people 15 feet tall, or 2 inches tall. The goddess's curse gave me a whole 6 inches of height to work with. I haven't been able to get my growth ray or my size watch to work, so there is every chance this is permanent. Not unbearable by any means, but a slight hindrance for my work. I'm just glad the ordeal's over. I might just have to go out on a date again soon, just to prove Aphrodite wrong.