I've always loved dressing as a girl even before elementary (I'm starting college in the fall) whether it be heels, whigs, nail polish you name it, but I also love being a man or at least I think I do? I have a few sissy clothes like panties and a skirt but I've been fearful about doing a lot out side of hiding whether it be family, friends, or random people judging. I want to try and slowly make my way into being a full time sissy but I'm just not sure, I want to shave my body and grow my hair out but im worried about people noticing, I also want to try getting fucked by a guy and sucking dick but I don't like men I only like dicks and cum so anytime im sexting a guy and he shows his face I get turned off and ghost him (I know, it's bad) I just don't know what to do. I hope this made sense lol, if it needs any clarification let me know! Dms are also open

Thanks!