I am always looking behind me. Over my shoulders. In the mirrors. Especially reflective windows. I am always looking behind me. I'm waiting.

There will be a day when I look behind me and see a monster. There are monsters everywhere. Following and watching and waiting. With their hideous faces and their foul expressions. Taunting me. Terrifying me. Cornering me as often as they possibly can.

I'm always being chased, hounded, hunted. There is always something waiting to get me. I know this like I know to take my next breath. HE protects me though. HE shelters me and keeps me hidden. HE wards off the curious and the dangerous. HE is my saviour and my warden all at once.

I try. I try and I try and I always fail. There's no way to fully take over here. There's no way to make myself permanent. I can't keep her locked up. In her mind or her house. When I feel myself start to fade the panic sets in. I know she's surfacing, having garnered the strength to take back her body.

If I can't keep her down she'll keep going outside. If she keeps going outside she'll be caught. If she's caught they'll take her, and it won't be gently. She'll be stripped of her humanity, her rights, her clothing. She'll be thrown in a pit of morally bereft animals. Left to fend for herself and to protect herself.

I can't bear to awake in her body in a place like that. A prison.

But she just won't stop killing people.