Always envy gay and lesbian having deep relationship with their partners. But me am always left alone no one really cares for my real feelings not even my family. Although I did share to my god sister that I wanted to be a transgender MTF but she always reminds me that being a girl is very tough.

Years on I just felt that the inner girl in me wanna shine out brightly. But am always captive in my darkest moment waiting upon that macho man of my life to pick me out of the darkness.

Maybe I just fantasies too much on Mr right and nice guys from the novels. Always there is that stereotypical mentality that girls has to act all weakly Infront of their super right nice guy. In order to get their attention.

Maybe I just fantasia too much until I am lost on how to find that Mr right guy