(I apologize in advance if my english isnt great)

(F) So I live sorrounded by conservatives. And ofc, they told me that queerness was wrong. And i wont say my actual age, but I was still a child. So i kinda grew with the thought that it was a sin, until i got more informed about it on social media later and normalized it. But internalized homophobia is a thing, so when around 6th this girl told me she had a crush on me, I spent the next couple of days thinking that maybe i liked her back. She was basically my bestfriend and i had never had a crush on someone before, so I couldnt compare my feelings for her with anything. Eventually i realized i did have a thing for her, but the way i was raised told me i was disgusting for it, so I couldnt speak to her until i finally ignored those thoughts and told her i liked her too; and we were in a secret, childish yet cute relationship for a year. But although it was my first love, i never labeled myself anything because I knew i was too young to know and only me and her knew, so I didn't feel like i needed to.

Years later i told some close friends about this girl and obviously their first question was "So are you a lesbian?" Theres the trick: I don't know. I havent had a crush on someone ever since. Not one. Ofc, I find celebrities attractive for obvious reasons, and I often picture myself in a relationship, buy the gender of my partner is never clear. So based on only celebrities and fictional characters, I could be fisically attracted to anyone with a heartbeat: women, men, non-binaries, everyone. I've tried many labels: bi, pan, omni, antro...none of those feel correct or incorrect, I just don't feel what I think i should feel finding the right label.

Maybe im being too picky about the labels, or the people? Maybe there's just no right label for me? Maybe im still in denial about not being straight bc of my background? Maybe I don't have enough experience and I should wait until im more mature to label myself(im underaged)? I don't know. Any advice, tips on self discovering or suggestions for labels I may not know about are very much welcome. Feel free to ask anything.

P.D.: Also recently I've been unsure about my gender so that's a problem too, but I'm probably a demigirl(?)