Got sexually assaulted at 14 thought I'd share (the worst 3 days of my life)

When I was 14 I got sexually assaulted by a girl I met on holiday. She started off nice and was all flirty which obviously made a teenage boy feel good. She was 16 or so but far more mature than me.

The first incident happened when she beckoned me into the ocean and flirted a bit before putting a hand down my trunks. Apparently she didn't like what she found there (I was 14 idk what she expected) and proceeded to insult me and squeeze 'me'. From there she scratched and slapped 'me' as well as mocking me physically the whole way through. She finished it off saying that if I told anyone she'd claim I raped her instead

Once it was finally over I went to find my family, seek refuge if you will, and had dinner. I told nobody. The next day, I thought it was behind and we went down to the beach again. I realised that I'd forgotten to put suncream on my back and shoulders so I went to the toilet to do. This woman somehow managed to Houdini her way in. This meant I was locked in a closed room with her.

What ensued was even worse. She kicked, punched, scratched, slapped, scratched and kneed me. I didn't scream - I thought she'd claim I hurt her and I'd be the villain. So is at there and took it. Then the verbal abuse started again. Fat, small dick, worthless, ugly, and a lot more than that. I'm worthless, I'll never find love, I don't deserve love, if I get a partner she'll just cheat on me and finally that I should just kill myself.

Once all that had finished and she'd left I turned to put my suncream on before thinking a frankly stupid plan. I didn't put suncream on, 40°C in Cyprus in the middle of summer for a whole day. I got second degree sunburns. This did work as an excuse to not go out, the initial plan, but it was also brutal corporal pain constantly. Again, I told no one of the ordeal.

The final issue is the third day of the story - which I spent sat in a hotel room alone just thinking, and she'd given me a lot to think about. I looked at myself in the mirror and felt sick, I thought about myself and felt disgusted but the main thing that kept coming back was that I'm worthless. And I should kill myself. And so I found the balcony and stood there, teetering, and contemplating everything until finally a made a decision.

I obviously stepped down and went inside, not out of self love or logical self preservation no, but spite. I didn't want to give her the satisfaction of knowing she'd given me those issues so I stayed.

Since then I've thinned down, look better and other things but I've still got issues from it - wild self worth issues and a crippling fear of being cheated on.

I did tell some people, some friends and my girlfriend. Only one person 'betrayes' me, telling someone else and changing the story so it sounded good for me. Kinda hate the guy ngl.

That's all cheers