hi, i’m a trans woman who doesn’t have sex much. i actually really talking & will converse for months w a man before having sex with them. After doing this w one man, and explaining to him my sexual history (or lack of) we arranging a time to meet and potentially have sex. when the day came, i asked my friend to borrow her car because i didn’t have my own and I left for his place around 11/12. When I got there, we chatted a little, i had a small drink and we made out. This is where things get tricky. I kind of remember laying on top of him making out, but i’m a big bitch so being on top of someone isn’t the most comfortable, but i don’t remember that either. Then i remember him helping me to the bed, but it’s flashes of memory. We had sex, i remember, but I don’t remember at all. I didn’t do anything except lay there. I remember driving home and it being morning, and i slept the next day. after that i continued existing and forgot about him really.

Today, i’m realized that something clearly happened that wasn’t supposed to, and I don’t feel great about it. But, is it possible I asked for it and also consented? Obviously, i didn’t ask to be drugged, BUT i literally can’t help but think I allowed him to do it. Advice? Mental clarity please & no mean words, thanks.