Anyone else? I feel alone a lot in this. I feel like I was traumatized even further by the hypersexuality almost... The hypersexuality I experience is like I'm almost trying to get raped again by putting myself in dangerous situations with men and hoping almost that they rape me???? Like wth? What's wrong with me? I feel almost like I'm afraid of getting raped again so I'm trying to rip that bandaid off and 'let' it happen again. Like I'm taking control of the rape itself. But I know that doesn't make sense to others. And I have schizoaffective disorder and OCD. Maybe that's why my behavior has been so strange? Anyone else experience this? I feel totally out of control when I engage in dangerous behavior like meet guys online then meet them in person the same day/let them drive me around, go to their house, have sex, drink with them, get high, etc. I feel like I'm TRYING to gain control but Im out of control really. I feel traumatized by both the rape and the consensual times I've had sex with men. And the times that guys have told me they were turned on by the thought of my rape..

Anyone else experience this? I see a therapist already and a psychiatrist. I have semi-supportive family-- they support me in regards to the rape but they call me a whore in regards to the hypersexuality..

Help?