I worked on a film once. It was a film that involved kink. One day on set I was in a full one piece costume with a hood (an entirely red devil costume with little horns), was wearing a leather harness, and had a collar and leash on. It was very hard to get out of costume. The director was really nice. There were talks on set of consent, respecting people, and being nice to me because wearing something like that all day can put me into a little bit of sub space, even though it's just pretend and not real.

Around the end of the shooting day, i was still in costume and going to get a snack from the craft table. Another cast member came up to me without warning and slapped me on the ass hard enough to make me instantly burst into tears. It shook fear all through me. I didn't understand I was safe but tried to pulled myself together.

I managed to get out "why did you do that??" And the person answered "because I thought it was okay." And I said NO. NO. that is NEVER okay to do to a person without asking. NEVER. do not EVER do that again.

But it really got to me. I was in a really vulnerable head space. Everything started to blur together when I got home. I was already a multiple-time SA survivor at the time and my brain couldn't handle it. The bad feeling never went away. I took pills to try to make the feeling go away and overdosed and had to go to the emergency room. I have never talked to this person again and squished a lot of that memory down.

Is this sexual assault? Is this sexual harassment? Is this harassment?