OK! So, after at least a decade of practise, I've uncovered some secrets regarding all things fingering. I thought I'd share, as best I could with the sole medium of text. You're welcome (and forgive the typos):

To start, we have some topics to cover - the basic elements, clit stuff, the fingering styles, and the technique(s) and shortcuts to squirting.

The Basic Elements:

• 1: what things are (no extra things to say, other than don't go too hard, lube is a joy not a curse, and they're all different - see this example, so interesting!).

• 2: hand position (always use your middle and ring finger. It's the best, you've got the pinky and index to anchor you, the right position with your palm and thumb, and can apply good pressure due to that on your middle and ring finger.

• 3: clit etiquette (as follows).

(3) The clit etiquette.

First and foremost, it's not flat. When resting in the labia, it's angled. This means that while 'dirty dj-ing' looks porno-ready and may intimate potential for a brainmelting orgasm (eyeroll) it won't work. You need to be angling your fingers down, in a sort of half-circle/curved motion, always, to be reaching the right spot. Sudeikis' straight fingers and hand, no curvature whatsoever, no pads of the fingers, and no fluid circling mean that's...not a good clit rubbing technique at all. Try and to the opposite; rest your pinky and index on either side of the clit, curve the pads of your fingers down, try and curl your fingers down too, overall. Make it a more fluid, circular, but pointing into the clit kind of movement. That'll work much better. :)

Additionally, the hood is not the same as the clit. When most people rub their clits, they're really rubbing the hood overtop of the clit. Think of it like rubbing the tip of an extremely sensitive penis through the foreskin. The clit's too sensitive to rub hoodless, so you rub little (remember, curved) circles into it overtop. Some good examples of this can be found via more amateur porn videos of a girl soloing - no lights, no excess cameras, just her doing it for her pleasure. The real methods and feel-good tactics start to emerge there (remember: most masturbation clips of women online are for male viewing - so likely won't feel that good, will be in an uncomfy position, and will end with some level of straight up pissing over an orgasm. This is because they know most men now conflate a gush of liquid with 'proof' of an O, fyi).

With these two in mind, the method to best play with the clit is as follows:

• Use your middle and ring finger, together (i.e. side by side) and rub gentle but somewhat pressured circular motions on the skin (hood) above the clit. These can be a little languid, widespread or not completely the same in every circle of your fingers, but remember not to apply too much pressure unless she asks for more. By curving your fingers to follow the shape of the labia and clit position, you'll inevitably brush your fingers over the actual clit anyway, but just enough that it actually works in your favour.

• If you're feeling extra (note: you should be), you can *even* splay out your two fingers and play with the skin surrounding the clit and clit hood. Softly, gently, maybe with a little pressure. As the labia is made of predominantly fat, you can usually always count on applying more pressure to the fattier or more stretchy parts of the pussy. So, while the clit hood should never be 'stretched' or firmly handled, lightly pulling on the outer labia lips, or massaging your hand and fingers across the softer parts of her pussy will likely only help arouse her.

• As you continue this, feel free to speed up the circles - maybe start to angle your fingers even more curved, and get more of the clit (as they become aroused, the clit will engorge anyway and become easier to find..and want to be found lol). Start to rub tighter, quicker circles - in comparison, I guess this isn't dissimilar to the speed at which guys will rub their fingers over the tip of their penis as they get closer to orgasming; not in aims to cum, but just to make things feel better and add some variation. Like that, adding tighter, quicker circles (remember, languid, relaxed and almost lazy all still apply here too - like this) can start to really encouraging an orgasm.

• The key, I've found, to cumming from this point onwards is to do all of those things, but a little harder and faster. To figure out when this is the right time, pay attention to things like changing moans (more, louder, quicker, more 'intense', harder), bucking hips, scrunched up expressions, etc. This varies person to person, but if nothing else, just ask. Some variant of 'quicker?', 'more?', 'do you like that?' will probably give you a semi-decent response (unless, like me, she's at a loss for words and may respond with some half-pissed-off-half-horned-up whines or huffs and humping your fingers..sorry).

• After this, you'll probably be okay. Just keep in mind that on average a female clit orgasm can take around 20 minutes. Any less is a double-win, a genetic predisposition, an extra horny girl (note: follicular and ovulation phase) or a fibber. With time and patience it'll become more like 5 minutes, or 3, or 23.5 seconds (a personal best, but it did take over 10 years of practise and two sprained wrists from the effort).

Okay, with that established, we can move onto the fingering styles. Man, it gets serious here. Some real secrets that would be a shame to gatekeep.

Before we get into it, a concept needs to be addressed, rubbing your fingers against the skin, versus rubbing the skin itself with your fingers are entirely different things, and the latter is leagues better, pretty much solely do this one unless asked otherwise, that's my advice!

Now, what does this have in relation to fingering? It means that when you're doing anything inside the vagina with your fingers, by rubbing the skin and not your fingers against it, you're then jostling the entire network of feel-good elements in the vagina and lower abdomen area. The clit, g-spot and overall sensitivity of the pussy is somewhat interconnected. By using your fingers to move the inside of the vagina as opposed to your fingers on/in it, you're inadvertently stimulating that entire area.

Think like if you strokes a few fingers on the skin in the middle of the shaft of your penis - that might feel okay, but not extend to anything like the other parts of the shaft, the tip, or the balls. Now consider using your hand, the palm, the fingers, curling and tightening around the skin of the shaft - you're no longer stroking the shaft skin, but actively pushing it around, and inadvertently the tip gets the end of that by the skin meeting it there, or your balls feel the buzz of it as you pull your palm down and reach the skin just under the base of the shaft. If you go hard enough, you may even start to jostle far back enough to reach the base of your stomach. That's what fingering the skin itself over rubbing against the skin does.

Alright, so onto finger positions. Once you see these, linking the above concept and the positions will make a lot more sense, okay? Humour me, because it's worth it. There are...6 main fingering positions. 9 if you include things like panties, spanking, or anal stuff. I won't. I've also given them 80's pseudo-raunchy cringe names to help you better remember them.

• 1, 'the penile finger': the in and out one, you know it probably. Since the g-spot is kind of the reason we're here, you'll want to be curving these fingers most of the time you're doing it.

• 2, 'the slide': this is dependent on preference, and to be used with others, but you basically keep the fingers curved like 1, but push the entire finger curves *right up against the pussy*. After giving the g-spot a stroke, you drag the fingers out a bit slower, applying more pressure as you pull them out, and do it over and over again. This is more of a 'foreplay' kind of fingering, and I do it when I'm done with one porn clip and searching for another..an interim position, if you will.

• 3, 'the one that makes you cum because it's so good'/'toggle': some warnings before this one -- make sure your nails are CLIPPED. And FILED. LOW. And make sure you're a ways away from the cervix (see diagrams linked), because you'll go hard with this one, and if you get the wrong position or bring nails into it, you mind be permanently banned from the pussy party. You basically take the position of 1, except curve even more, get even deeper, and toggle the hell out of the g-spot.

You use the finger parts from the second knuckle to the fingertips for this, and jostle the entire inner g-spot pussy area. The deeper you go (note: go deep in the direction of where the g-spot is, not 'back' towards the cervix), and the wider your finger toggles, and the faster you do them, the better it feels. I LOVE this one, and I've found my g-spot (to the left, back, and UP), so I do this until I start to let out little sobs, it's very, very nice.

• 4, 'the sniper': this is purely the ring finger. It's got more precision for me personally, and gains interesting results when used solely. It's basically the same as 3, except you don't toggle up and down, but instead in similar circular motions as when you rub the clit. it's like doing a rainbow shape in the pussy, against the g-spot, with just the ring finger. This, for me, is the 'jesus I just did 3 for 10 minutes and am all sweaty. I need a break, but want to cum, so I'll do 4 for 2 minutes and get back to 3 to cum'.

• 5, 'the brute force finger': the middle finger version of 4. You're only using the middle finger, except the motion is like a mix of 3's toggling and 2's right-up-against-the-pussy-wall position. It's more for slower strokes, similar to when you do slow, hard pounds of a dick into a pussy when you're both out of breath and need a little break, but aren't finished by any means. You move the tip and middle of the finger back and forth, toggling it in the g-spot area, but drag it around a bit, and ultimately up out of the pussy after each 'stroke'.

• 6, 'the roundabout': this one's great. A little bizarre, not for everyone, but it's a good way to get any pussy even if you can't find the g-spot specifically. You take your index and ring finger, place them side by side like when you rub the clit, and move in a circular motion with both. Think like a big spoon stirring a pot of chilli, but doing that in your pussy (and not so wide, or firm). Move with the shape of the pussy, and add a little curl to the fingers as you move upwards on the stroke - it feels better.

Okay, considering those movements, remember the skin stuff we talked about? Yeah, whenever your fingers touch a part of the pussy, and they need to rub against it as advised above, rub the pussy itself, not the skin. Check the examples above on that in that paragraph. I just figured I'd remind you here too!

Now, for top tips on squirting, we need to come to some understandings. 'Squirt' can be a mix of things. It's debated online, and not enough studies have really clarified what 'it' is, but you can expect a mix of vaginal discharge ('pussy juice'), urine, and there may or may not be some additional, alternative liquefied form of discharge that looks more like a really, really liquidy form of precum. But again, this varies. I get a mix, some just piss, some don't have any.

It's the luck of the draw really (I win again, woo!). 3's finger movements, for me personally, ensure squirting the best. Being sat up helps too, but that may be me. Drinking a bunch of water, letting it sit, and then using the 3 method will have the best chances. I don't urinate (as I'll squirt, and then piss after I'm completely done masturbating), but the extra pressure on the bladder ensures a heightened state of sensitivity for everything.

So: - drink lots of water, need to piss. - sit up, or find a way to scrunch up your abdomen so your pussy's much more pushed together, and getting deeper and finding the g-spot is easier. - use a deep, quick, g-spot-centred form of fingering to ensure the best chance of squirting. - It's still a chance thing, and takes a lot of different positions, efforts, tactics and more to work for each individual, but these I find work best for me, and might for you too.

Yep, there you go. I just felt compelled to share, and I'd love to hear any feedback if you've got some. I love all things sex, so I'd love to further discuss any questions or queries too.