Like many insecure girls, I appear quiet and shy. Which I am, but I also crave attention from men. I did not grow up attractive. I was just a freckly little school girl with glasses that no one paid a lot attention to.

I started my career working in an office, until someone suggested i tried modelling, which seemed crazy to me at the time. And even now, after 15 years as a professional model, i still feel like an imposter. i don't think i've ever came totally comfortable with it.

i look for reassurance anywhere i can get it. Even the smallest comment from a stranger can boost my confidence for the day. While a lot of women may be offended by a guy whistling at them from his car, i only pretend to be, and will often go out of my way to attract 'unwanted' attention.

I recently moved apartments in Mexico City, and the new place has two bedroom, both with floor to ceiling glass. It's on the top floor and the view looks across a busy six lane main road, to another apparent block currently under construction. There are rarely less than 30 workers across the two open sided floors.

When i first arrived there were no curtains at all, and they all had a direct line of sight into which ever room i happened to be in. There was no privacy at all. I eventually found some black out curtains, but obviously don't want to live with them shut all day.

I had been having an on and off 'relationship' with a photographer for the past year or so. But on this one day, it was the first time he had been round and he'd not tried kiss me. What may or may not happen between us was always unpredictable, but we worked together a lot, and there'd always be something vaguely romantic on most encounters. Not always sex, but certainly affection. And always initiated by him.

As he said good bye this time with just a hug, I felt completely rejected. All my insecurities about my desirability flooded back in.We'd been taking a few photographs against the white walls of the bedroom, so the curtains were fully open to let as much light in as possible. It had been a lingerie shoot, so the workers opposite had been thoroughly enjoying themselves.

I walked back into the apt feeling confused and insecure after such a formal goodbye. i looked at the guys working across the street and wanted their full attention. i went to my bedroom, took off my panties and opened my legs directly in front of them. Inches from the glass window. I licked my fingers and pressed my fingers into my already wet pussy, and used them to rub my clit to orgasm.

When the wave in my head subsided, i just lay there frozen. I did not want to look up. i knew what i'd see. So i rolled onto my side, and looking at the floor reached forward to pull the curtains across. But before they were closed all the way, i dared a glance across the street.

Every single guy way literally hanging off the side of the building in front. All desperate to get a better look. Half of them with their phones recording.Whilst I was feeling extremely embarrassed, it had worked in making me feel desirable. Except I will never be able to open the curtains ever again!